I am done crying over spilt milk...

I’m over the urge to put my fist through the computer or just sit in the middle of my office floor and scream... so I can write a semi-coherent blog now.

Tuesday night was a late night getting all the cow files done for Milk Maritime and I made jpgs of the files for the client before shutting down the computer and crawling off to bed. Others who had this flu warned me that there was a backlash a few days after you started feeling better, and yesterday was definitely an off day... and a hectic one with Bethany “helping” do groceries and other errands. Erin had a marvelous run at cross country practice and I had choir practice, so by the time I got home, I went right to bed intending to start fresh this morning.

This morning when I turned on the computer and went to make the three tiny final corrections to the Teacher’s newsletter files, that both the French file and the most recent English version were somehow corrupted and unable to open. Talk about feeling sick to your stomach!! I now know how stitchers who have something spill onto a piece of needlework that they have put countless hours of time into feel when they first see the ruins of their work.

I did get a few graphics friends around town with the same or newer versions of the program to see if they could open the files, but alas... no luck. All my other files are fine and the Parent Newsletter built in a separate program is fine, but the task of recreating and re-typesetting the French version (and bringing the older English version in line with the newer one will have to take up the whole night. Final electronic proofs have to be sent off to Fredericton for government approval tomorrow morning no matter what.

I love the lamentations in the Psalms... because the writer goes ahead and rants to God at the beginning... WHY did this have to happen?? WHY me?? WHY now!! WHAT are the odds and why couldn’t they have been the lottery type instead of the unlucky type.... but like the psalmist by the end of the passage, I can only think of what I DO have...

The files will build faster the second time around....

Nick has been an angel helping with the kids and giving up a night at the gym for his workout so that I have extra time on the computer....

Only the files are toast, not my computer....

Nobody got hurt....

I live in a country of more than plenty....

I can’t wait to teach my classes in Toronto...

“I complained I had no shoes... until I met someone who had no feet....”

Sometimes you just can’t cry over spilled milk. You just do what needs to be done and count the blessings that you do have!

Two steps forward... one step back...

Another nice, quiet Monday morning.. and yet I seem to have so little energy. Perhaps a rebound from the flu that hit our house last week, perhaps a reaction to so much elephant left to eat... but I feel about as sharp as a sack of wet mice!

I slogged away on the corrections to the English Teacher’s newsletter and got all of the French translations in place except one recipe which they forgot to send the French version of... but then the English layout got all moved around about 3 pm this afternoon! I could have just screamed! Now I have to try to compare the French version and figure out which paragraphs to move where... so it is a darned good thing that I can speak both languages to make heads or tails of what I am doing! It would have been SO much easier if they could have gotten the English version to EXACTLY what they wanted and THEN sent if for translation!!!

This morning Bethany asked about next Monday (which is Thanksgiving Monday here in Canada). She knows that she won’t have to go to daycare and that Erin and Nick won’t have to go to school... but then she looks up at me with those big blue eyes and says “can you take a break from your computer too, Mommy?” Ouch! Out of the mouth of babes!

I told her that I would try to have a whole family lazy day... but with leaving for Toronto on the 17th... and all these changes to Milk stuff that should have been wrapped up two weeks ago if the information had been on time may make for some late nights!

This will give me one more twisted grin to make when someone says “Oh... you must love having so much control over your own time working from home!!”

Of Rummage Sales and Fall Delights...

I had forgotten just how much fun a rummage sale could be when you are a child! As adults, we tend to love the bargains that are available, as well as the possibilities of finding treasures in someone else’s junk... but we tend to look things over with a critical eye. Erin and Bethany were in their element at our church rummage sale... poking through the piles with a five dollar bill clutched tightly in their fists.

Bethany found a giant ziplock bag of assorted plastic farm animals and equipment (though there was also a hippo, a cactus, a palm tree, a stop light, two construction workers and a few road signs... so that sounds like a pretty neat farm to me!) Erin had seen a small plush kitten last Sunday in the piles of stuff waiting to be sorted for the rummage sale. When I brought my own boxes of stuff in to donate (does it ever feel good to clean out some closets!) and told them that Erin had her eye on that kitten, the plush toy disappeared into the kitchen to keep it safe for her. Erin also found a rose pin and a small wooden chest with 3 drawers that is also a music box... and her eyes just shone as she brought everything to the cash. Bethany has still not grasped the concept of how much “monnies” really are, but Erin was just thrilled when the lady at the cash told her that the prices of things depended on your age!! She charged a dollar and a quarter for all of Erin’s treasures and so Erin was thrilled with the amount of change she was able to keep.... then she turned to Nick and I and announced “Well, you’ll have to pay a lot more because you are both so OLD!” (Hmmmmph!)

After all our workouts, swimming lessons and gymnastics this morning, we got the laundry on the line in the crisp fall breeze and I made myself a big mug of tea to stave off the urge to have a LONG afternoon nap. I have finished all of the English layouts for the School Milk pieces and the teacher’s newsletter, but it was time to squash and squeeze all of the French translations into place. While the basic layout remains the same, you often have to really play with the type sizes and move things around to get the longer sentences to fit in the same amount of space and still look nice.

Erin has been studying apples in her French Immersion class and had a recipe for microwaved apples to make, so I tried to find that fine line between letting her do it all and helping her learn how to do stuff like cream margarine and brown sugar together without sending the sugar everywhere. I must call my Mom tonight and thank her for all her patience in teaching ME how to cook.

Now that the girls are down for the night, it is time to assemble the 300 chartpacks, whose covers printed out in batches on the other computer while I worked on the Milk stuff this afternoon, while we watch a DVD.

On the Mend...

Our family is on the mend at last.. though I am still VERY tired. Nick went back to work today having spent most of yesterday sleeping or taking it easy like I tried to do. It is a struggle... when you know there are things that are supposed to get done and you just don’t have the strength to do them. Today, I feel at least 75 percent back to being myself, but I can tell it will still be an early night... and my shortest blog yet.

I Can’t Even Have the FLU in Peace...

I know why I felt so awful trying to work last night. This morning I woke up feeling like dog’s chew toy that has been shaken a bit too hard. Luckily, though I feel pretty queasy and have little or no interest in food, I haven’t been sick to my tummy. That would mean a trip to the hospital and several hours on an IV with a drug called Maxoran. One of the leftovers from gallbladder attacks during my pregnancy with Erin and over 6 months of medicated morning sickness with Bethany, is that my stomach can’t stop once it starts being sick- that nerve that acts as the OFF switch is just not working properly.

Erin has been fighting an ear infection and Bethany a sinus infection, so I kept them both home to give the antibiotics time to kick in. They were angels about playing as quietly as they could at 8 and 4 while I grabbed a few more hours of sleep once Nick got off to work... but then he called at lunch time to say that he felt about 12 hours behind me and was coming home!

So the cave is full of sooky feeling dragons and this is about all I have the strength to blog right now. Thank goodness this is hitting now, even if it is in the middle of cows and kitting for CSNF... I’d hate to have something like this hit when I had to be traveling or away from home!

It could be worse.... I could be sick in Halifax where they still have no power after Hurricane Juan!!

Up To My Armpits in Cows and Eating Elephants...

I forget where I first heard the expression “Eat your elephant one bite at a time”... but being a visual person, I loved the idea that something so huge could be tackled one little bit at a time. Notice that it doesn’t say “in one sitting”. With our deadline conscious world and frantic pace, it is often easy to think that we must accomplish everything on our “to do” list each day... then we beat ourselves up if we don’t get through it all!

I am up to my armpits in cows... but luckily not cow patties. A few years ago, I was one of a few artists to submit a mascot for the Elementary School Milk program that the Dairy Farmers of Canada - Maritimes promotes throughout the schools. My “pikacow” (I told them that short, cute and pudgy à la Pokémon style was in...) called Moo-Moo got the best reviews from the panel of test kids and I have been drawing cows for school posters and newsletters ever since. Due to some TV campaigns and other marketing things this year, the information was a bit late coming my way, but we still have press deadlines to meet... so the cows and I have been spending more quality time together than I would like on evenings and weekends. The English layouts are now completed and waiting to be proofed and approved. Once the translations are complete, I just have to take the same layouts and squeeze the French text into the appropriate places. French is usually longer, so you have to play with the spacing a bit... but essentially, once the layout and design is done, creating the French version is relatively easy.

So I feel as if my elephant is getting eaten.. but with the CSNF show in Toronto just 19 days away, the two projects have overlapped WAY closer than I’ve liked!! The only wonderful things is that, in the middle of the chaos, I am able to go outside and hang a load of laundry or save a brown and black fuzzy caterpillar from being sunburned on our deck or look out at the sweep of trees finally changing colours in the park at the end of the street. Remembering to take those pauses... those moments between bites... is SO essential -
otherwise you choke!

Explaining Needlework to Strangers....

Well, Hurricane Juan walloped Halifax, but Moncton got off with only a bit of rain and wind. The storm tracked further East than expected, for which we are grateful, especially as we watch news footage of the stately trees in Halifax that have toppled onto houses and cars.

I had some time to sit today in a waiting room to get my blood pressure checked (I’d been feeling a little off, but the doctor thinks it might just be the start of a flu because everything checked out OK) and took out some Illustrative Blackwork to stitch on. It is quite funny to watch how people try to look at what you are doing without it being obvious that they are trying to look. Finally, one of the ladies spoke up. “That’s not cross stitch is it... there’s no colour!”

I began to explain about how it worked and suddenly the woman’s face light up. “It’s all backstitch!” she smiled. “I like that effect!”

We are such a more insular society these days... far fewer quilting bees and community gatherings where people would bring out their whittling, knitting, piecework or needlework. There are far fewer opportunities for people to see others doing something that they enjoy outside the sanctuary of their own home.

I think I will make a point of always taking some needlework along with me to meetings or to wait at sports meets now that Erin is getting into stuff at school. Who knows how many people may ask me what I am doing with those pieces of string!

There’s A Hurricane A Comin’...

Juan is on its way to the Maritimes tonight... and even though we know it won’t be anything like what Virginia and other states experienced with Isabelle, we are still battening down the hatches and putting the lawn furniture in the shed.

Today I could tell from the way my kids behaved that there was something afoot barometrically.... when I owned cats, I always knew when there was a storm coming because they would get the “kitty wilds”.

The winds of a storm can be both a wonderful and terrifying thing. I remember the summer we visited my mom and stepfather in Sherbrooke during a “micro-burst” that ripped huge trees out by their roots, demolished buildings and knocked out the power for several days. (back when I depended on that Barney video to give me one half an hour sanity break now and then...)

Storms, both weather related and the kind that happen in our daily lives, are often something that we’d prefer not to experience... but we cannot always control where and when and to whom they may happen. I still remember a poster that was on my wall throughout University: “Faith can either calm the storm or give you the strength to endure it.”
This has been said many ways and probably in many faiths... but I know that tonight if the winds pick up and wake me from my slumber, I will think about this until the winds die down and the storm has passed.

Floss Patters Anonymous

The new colours of Waterlilies Silks arrived from Caron Collection yesterday, along with the specialty silks that I bought to go in the kits I am making up for the CSNF in Toronto next month. I just had to run them over to our local shop and spread them out on the counter... because very few people would understand the incredible urge to fondle and drool over small skeins of “string”. Just looking at some of the colours actually made me want to design something so that I could use them. One new colour just begs to be the tummy scales on a baby dragon... another is just perfect for something dark and mysterious like the inner wings of a dragon perched on some cliff looking down at her pile of treasure.... and some of them just make me want to pick them up at pat them like there are little tribbles. (any others out there who were kids during the airing of the original Star Trek episodes who wished they could have tribbles of their own?? My mom found me a bit of fur off an old coat or muff... but it wasn’t the same!)

Now the rational part of my brain understands that handling these fibres with dirty oily hands or even hands that are chapped and rough will do damage to the delicate silk fibres... but I just want to make a pile of them and pat them all... or rub them against a cheek to feel how soft they are...

Ok.... I’ll behave. But I never had the urge to do this with watercolour paints. Stitching is such a wonderful tactile medium!!

Knowing What You Want To Be When You Grow Up

I was reminded today, in conversation with a neighbour, just how early in my life I decided to “make pictures” for a living. I was 11 when I won a contest sponsored by Jack and Jill magazine and got to travel down to Indianapolis, Indiana from Montreal to visit the Saturday Evening Post Publishing Company with the 4 other illustrators and 5 young writers who had also won. The part of that whirlwind 4 days that I remember most was walking into a room where 2 grown men were planning out the order in which the drawings should appear for a colouring book. It was like being struck by lightning between the eyes. The light bulb went off... “Grown-ups can DRAW for their JOBS!!”

In some ways, it was very hard to know so early on what I wanted to do. I wasn’t sure how or where or when I would accomplish that. I certainly never dreamed that the magic and sparkle of needlework would captivate me when it did. I wasn’t sure that my dream could come true living in a smaller city like Moncton compared to Montreal or Toronto....

My neighbour said, with a somewhat wistful smile, “You are so lucky to be able to do something you love!!”

I smiled back as I headed in from hanging the laundry and back to the computer to slog away at this huge graphics project that has consumed so many hours of this week. “This has more to do with hard work that Luck!” I muttered to myself as I began to mouse and click... but then I stopped and a slow smile spread across my face. She had been right about how fortunate I was to be doing something that I loved, even if it was grueling.

I think that sometimes it is a lot like being a parent.... It requires more work that others may ever understand when they look in from the outside.. but one sudden hug or “I LOVE YOU” makes all the work worthwhile.

Captivated By Limited Colours...

It’s funny how Art imitates Life... actually the parallel today was more between my graphic design work and my current fascination with Illustrative Blackwork. I have been working on a few projects for the Dairy Farmers of Canada-Maritimes. The newsletter for Elementary Teachers is designed to be printed in only two colours- a blue and black (I didn’t want to say black and blue because I always think of those “black and blue and red all over” jokes that I used to tell and that Erin finds so hilarious now... but I still said it!) Working with a limited colour palette really makes you pay attention to shade and tone as well as how you can combine just a few colours to create more. I had the pleasure of seeing the client’s reaction to the first proofs as well which made the VERY late night last night feel a bit more bearable.

Then there is the Illustrative Blackwork. I blame it all on Linn Skinner for starting the addiction by showing me her incredibly lovely work in Nashville almost 3 years ago.. and to the nimble fingers and amazing talent of Leon Conrad for keeping me fascinated with how much can actually be accomplished using tone and pattern and density in a single colour.

With the changes in technology, it is easier than ever to produce full colour illustrations and brochures and images at a fraction of the cost. Moving fonts and images around today with a client seated at my elbow made me very glad that I am designing in THIS age instead of when mockups were drawn by hand and a single colour or word change meant a whole new drawing. Yet I also thin of some of those older children’s books that did SO much with just a few spot colours and I marvel at the Mastery involved.

Isn’t it interesting that sometimes putting limits on something actually inspires us to be more creative... I shall ponder that one as I head off to bed... perchance to dream. Will I dream in just a few colours or patterns tonight??

Caught in the Whirlwind

There really is no other way to describe it. A whirlwind.. a supernova.. a tiger by the tail... a dragon perched on your shoulder with claws slightly dug into your skin... an ultimate rapture of creativity that almost transcends time....

Sometimes... on those very rare and special moments, a design springs forth in this kind of maelstrom and completely seizes me. It is as if I cannot stop until it has been brought fully into this world from the intangible swirl of the imaginary and anchored into the preciseness of the grid-lined paper before me. I have read about writers who have the characters in their stories take them to places that they never expected to go... and I think that during from very brief moments of my life, I have understood what they are trying to share.

The funniest thing is, although the very act of creating (or is it just helping to birth?) such a design is always an unforgettable high, it is in no way a guarantee that this new design will be any better a seller from a commercial point of view. Some designs that have taken a long time to perfect and craft can sell as well as designs which come in a creative fury. There is certainly a satisfaction in both ways of designing...as different as the two experiences are. Perhaps it is like relationships. Some friendships take time to grow and other times you sense an incredible connection with another “kindred spirit” within minutes of meeting them. Either way of designing brings me joy... but there is a certain regrettable sweetness to stepping back from the page or computer screen once the storm has calmed and the whirlwind died... to look at the page and know that this is how that design was “meant to be”. Moments like that sustain me through so much of the everyday business and busyness that may come with being a designer and business person.

Back into the FULL swing of things!!

Yikes! No wonder today’s blog is so late... the after school and evening activities are in full swing and I am not sure if I am a designer, mom or taxi driver!! Nick and I have been doing aerobics together every Monday night for the past 3 years together... but as our baby-sitters grew up and developed lives in the later years of high school, we were down to one wonderful set of sisters who lived much closer to the Gym than to our home. It somehow seemed wasteful on gas to drive all the way there, pick up the sitter, drive her home to be with our girls, both jump in the car to head down to one hour of aerobics, drive home, one of us drive all the way back down there to drop off the baby-sitter at her house and then return to our house for the night. For the past 3 weeks, we have tried taking the girls along with us and having the baby-sitter spend time with them there in the family lounge.. but 8:30 is just a little too late for Bethany to handle and still function properly the next morning at 6:20 am. So, we’ve decided to spell each other and take turns with that workout while the other one will go Sunday night.

Tonight was Erin’s first Brownie meeting for the year. Her group almost folded for lack of leaders since one was transferred to Halifax and the other got married and went back to school. One of our best friends volunteered to be the Brown Owl to keep the 8 girls from heading off to other troops on other nights. I got a few of those “you used to be a Guide” looks and comments from some of the organizers... but I just don’t have the hours to squeeze that in!

Tomorrow night Nick has to be at school late for Home and School elections, then Thursday night is the Meet the Teacher (Meet the Creature as Nick calls it) night at Erin’s school... so we will take turns covering home base while the other is out.

With the Creative Sewing and Needlework Festival now less than a month away and some very big graphics project on my plate right now, (I even have to voice some demo radio commercials tomorrow with Bethany in tow!) I just have to hunker down and concentrate on family and work... but I know how many other parents out there are feeling as frayed and frazzled at some of the schedules we make ourselves keep. No wonder we long for the lazy days of Summer!

Erin was actually asking about other activities to get into when the Cross Country Running is done and I very firmly said “NO”! Kids need to have downtime. Adults need to have downtime and balance... and that is about all that I will write on the matter for tonight so that I can get to bed at a reasonable hour myself tonight. I wish that I could really just flap my dragon wings to get places quickly... wouldn't that be cool??

Tell Me Why.... I DO Like Mondays...

As someone who went my tweens and teens in the late 70s and early 80s, I remember that catchy song “Tell me why I don’t like Mondays” that had such wonderful music with such sad lyrics about shooting the whole world down.

I actually quite like the silence of Mondays, especially the morning. Not that the alarm going off in the dark now at about 6:10 doesn’t feel jarring compared to the blissful sleep in of Sunday mornings (it is amazing how luxurious it feels to sleep in until 8:30!) Nick and Bethany head out the door around 7:20 and I walk Erin up to the bus for 7:50. Right now the walk home is crisp but still pleasant and I return to an empty, quiet house to make myself a mug of tea and get the day underway.

Even on weeks such as this, when there seem to be far to many projects to handle than the hours will allow, there is a certain serenity to getting my day and week underway. I take the first half and hour, with my claws wrapped around a warm mug of tea, to set our my priorities... and then dive in to many tasks at once. I have checked e-mail for the morning and as I write my blog on one computer, the second is printing out covers for an order to the UK which needs to ship out tomorrow. The first load of wash is finished and I will take a stretch to get that on the line before coming back down to invoice a client for a translation job I wrapped up on the weekend. Once that is done, I have 3 projects on my plate for our local Milk Marketing board. I draw Moo-Moo the cow and am doing the graphic design work for the teacher’s newsletter, the parent piece which goes home to the kids and the poster to promote a new nutritional program for middle school students. Of course there are also the kits to get ready for the CSNF in Toronto in just under 4 weeks and a new design for a hard cover book that I have been invited to submit a design for...plus a few other projects I have my tail and claws into.

Mondays also hold that “clean slate” feel to them for me, because you just never know what fun the week will hold and right now it is all about possibilities... including the very real possibility that it is time to stop musing and get my dragon butt in gear!

Of Mice and My Man...

I meant to write this entry last night, but after a hectic week for both of us, Nick and I got a baby-sitter and went out to a wonderful dinner at our local sushi restaurant with our good friend, Karen, and talked most of the night away... so by the time I got home, it was a little late to power up the computer. Saturday mornings, the clock radio alarm goes off at 7:10... which is a whole hour later than on the weekdays.. so that we can all get out the door and to Saint Pat’s Family Centre. By noon, the girls have each done an hour of gymnastics and one swimming lesson while I have either taught the circuit training class or had my own workout while Nick takes the class. I teach every second Saturday and fill in for the main instructor now and then if life happens.

Speaking of things happening, Nick had a bit to much excitement at his school yesterday! The large grass field behind Arnold H. McLeod school, where my husband is the Vice-Principal & Gym Teacher, used to be shared by the school and the City of Moncton so that it could be used as a ball field as well as a grassy area for track and field. When the City began to centralize everything, they stopped mowing the smaller fields and by school opening this fall, the grass had grown almost to Nick’s waist! (He’s 6’5 1/2” so that’s pretty high!)

On Friday, someone was finally sent to mow down the field while Nick was holding an outdoor gym class. He noticed that of his students kept staring down at the grass and went over to see what was holding the child’s attention. “Look at all the little mice, Mr. Smith!!” the boy yelled. Sure enough, all of the “critters” that had been living in the lush field over the summer were now fleeing the sharp blades of the mower in a scene that made him think of “The Secret of Nimh”. Unfortunately, the way the field was being mowed meant that the animals were being herded in the direction of the school and the kids playing outside.

Let’s just say that for Nick, rodents provoke a similar reaction in him that spiders do in me. The primal urge to flee, scream or find the nearest possible weapon and defend yourself is pretty strong, even though you keep reminding yourself that you are a rational adult which is MUCH bigger and smarter than said defenseless creature.

As the mower turned for the next pass, reducing the grassy strip that remained to less than about 4 feet, the was a sudden movement in the grass as dozens of mice and at least one large rat burst from the greenery and began to charge up the hill towards the playground. Nick assures me that from that distance, their teeth suddenly grew into large fangs and that their eyes gleamed red in the light of the sun... but I think that may have been those panic endorphins kicking in. Though they looked as if they would be upon him in seconds... the rodents never even got within 75 meters of the school.

Nick herded the children to safety in a very calm, but extremely quick manner and got everyone inside. After consulting with the Principal, they jointly decided to cancel the fire drill that was supposed to be held that day. Half of the school is supposed to rendezvous on the hill by the field as their “safety area” but with all the rodents running around in total panic at having been so recently evicted... the administration decided to wait until things calmed down a bit.... Smart Call.

P.S. After reading this blog entry, Nick asked me to put in that no children or rodents were harmed in any way during this adventure.

Learning from Erin...

Today was discouraging... I’d been trying to get the office cleaned up a bit and caught up on paper work, but there were lots of e-mails to answer. Today included not one but 2 apparent cases of copyright infringement... and I can’t pretend that it doesn’t really hurt. I’ve been told that I should be “flattered” that someone likes my images enough to want to share them, but it certainly doesn’t feel like a compliment. It feels like theft. One case is a bit more disturbing than the other because it looks as if the chart the person is stitching from might have been “recreated” somehow, but I may never know unless they are willing to send in the illegal copy.

I was stewing over these incidents as I hung up the laundry to get a break from the computer. We are still in the midst of a wonderful warm spell and I was thinking of Erin running yesterday. Not only had she gotten lost, she had shared that when she did find her way back on the proper path, someone teased her about looking for a shortcut like the “others who wanted to make good time”. She asked me if some people would actually cheat to win the race.

Ouch! Who says kids can’t ask really tough questions at only 8??!!

This prompted one of those Mother/Daughter talks about being true to yourself and having the integrity to do what is right... even if is doesn’t get you ahead as fast as someone who cheats. lies or makes others look bad. I asked her how she thought a person who cheated would feel when everyone was complimenting them on the podium for winning the race. She thought about it and decided the person would “feel all woozy in their tummy ’cause they knew the truth”. Hmmmmm! That’s one smart little dragonlet there!

I sat down to check e-mail again to be sure another reply for business had gone through.. and there was a note from Kreinik about the Reflections Newsletter featuring a project that I had the pleasure of designing with their glow in the dark threads and a lovely profile about me that made me blush. It is still strange to read how I am seen through another’s eyes.

So today, I am reminded of my daughter’s example... to keep running until I get to that finish line. To run the race without cheating, even if it means that someone else “wins” and also to have to blow the whistle when I do see something wrong being done.

One of the reasons that I was so interested in starting this blog was to put a very human face on the person behind the dragons... As I wrote a few days ago - don’t let anyone make you give up on your dreams!!

Never be afraid to learn from your kids either. Sometimes I think they are a lot more intelligent than us grown-ups!

Watching My Children With Wonder...

Today’s musings have nothing to do with stitching and everything to do with life. This mother Dragon is so proud of her oldest dragonlet, Erin, it just had to work its way into today’s blog.

Now that she is in Grade 3, Erin is allowed to take part in some of the activities held after instructional time and has cheerfully gotten involved in both Choir and Cross-Country Running. Having been the child who always hurt herself in gym class or was the last one picked on teams for sports, I am always amazed at how much athletic ability and energy are packed into my oldest child.

Today was the second practice ever at the huge 2.3 km course (don’t ask me what that is in miles... I am totally metric for distance!) that winds its way through Moncton’s Centennial Park. Last week, Erin completed the course in 16.28 minutes, despite getting lost on one side trail and being distracted by a chipmunk. Today, she made a wrong turn between the two spotters on the course and got TOTALLY lost.

If it had been me, (and I doubt it ever would have been because I would never have had the courage to try out for the team) I would have been the one they sent the search party out for because I would have sat down in the trail and just cried... waiting for someone to find me. At least that is how I would have been at 8 years old.

Erin crossed the finish line at a run in 20 minutes and 14 seconds and THEN burst into tears... When she explained about being lost, Mr. Stewart, the wonderful teacher in charge of the event for the whole District, took a few of his precious minutes to bend down and speak to Erin, face to face. He found out where on the course she’d gotten confused... and then explained to her that next week she needed to stay on the main road between the two spotters. “When you see a parent/spotter, they will tell you when and where to turn,” he explained.

I’ve told her many times tonight how proud I am that she even finished the practice run... that I marvel at how she held it together until she finished the race... and I just hope that some of it sunk in.

How amazing to watch your child spread her wings and fly in a direction you never expected....

Never Give Up On A Dream...

In a conversation this morning about following your dreams, I was reminded of the fact that I almost gave up on cross stitch before I even really got started!

When I was planning to attend my first trade show, I visited an Economic Development Commission to find out what programs were in place to help with the costs of getting from Moncton, New Brunswick to Charlotte, North Carolina. In speaking with other designers and cross stitch shops, I knew that this was one of the best shows to attend in order to wholesale my designs to shops from North America and around the world. I went in armed to the gills with facts and figures only to end up across a desk from a “guy in a tie” who said:
“Let me see if I understand this... people make Xs with string on cloth?”

I knew that didn’t bode well, so I tried to explain that I was producing the PATTERNS from which people who did cross stitch could create their own versions. At that point, he smiled politely and said “Sweetie, I think you need to get yourself a table at the next big craft fair up at the coliseum and see how the patterns go over here in Atlantic Canada. That sounds more like a HOBBY to me!” Never call a 6’5” woman “Sweetie”.... it makes us vengeful!

Needless to say, Nick and I did not get any funding that year. What we DID do was take the money from that year’s tax return, pack up the 10 designs in a laundry basket, load them into our Subaru station wagon along with our camping gear and clothing. I took my 2 weeks of vacation to coincide with the shows dates landing in the middle and we drove from Moncton to Charlotte. Our Subaru had no air conditioning, so when it got too sticky (as it does in late July as you drive South) we would find a mall and walk around for a little while until we cooled down.

We lost our muffler in Roanoke and pulled into Charlotte sounding like a tractor... but that is another part of the adventure.

When faced with that obvious belittlement of what I was trying to do, I could have listened to what an economic advisor told me... I could have given in to those doubts that began to whisper in my head...but I chose to chase my dream instead. I learned that if you want something badly enough, and you are willing to do whatever work it takes to make that dream come true, then no one else has the right to tell you that dream is foolish. It may not work out the way you first envision it... but there is nothing like having your fingertips at least brush the stardust!

Beach Glass and Campfire Sparks

This weekend gave us one last taste of summer weather and we had the most wonderful spot on earth in which to enjoy it! Nick, Erin, Bethany and I headed about 45 minutes out of Moncton to the Northumberland Straight where the United Church Camp Ta-Wa-Si is located for an overnight church retreat. We got there in time to register and enjoy lunch before taking part in wonderfully crazy get to know you games and an afternoon of combing the beach for beach glass and seashells. As the temperature soared, we even dipped ourselves in the ocean for one last time this season...but the water was very chilly! The Dragon had goose bumps on her scales!!

This is the third summer that our girls have been to the camp for a private church rental like this, so they know the site well and loved the new play park. They also know the ground rules about playing beside the dining hall or coming to tell us if they are heading to the tire swings at the edge of the woods. It was nice to be able to sit and enjoy some time with other adults or linger at a meal, knowing that our daughters were having the chance to run around and explore in a safe place. There are less chances for our children to do this now than when we were kids roaming around our neighbourhoods. Just today, one of the other parents at the bus stop warned me that someone has been lurking near our neighbourhood park trying to encourage children to get in his car!

I also loved the chance to sing around the campfire... though I am still on a hunt for other former girl guides who know the song “Barges”. The harmony to that song is one of my favourites to sing... and yet I almost never find anyone who knows what I am talking about. I guess Barney helped keep other songs like “Alice the Camel” alive for the new generation. Sigh... I shall just have to teach the song to my daughter’s Brownie Pack!

I came back so recharged... if not very rested after a night on camp bunk beds. I had intended to post this entry last night or first thing this morning once I got everyone off to school... but Erin’s school had a water main break and so we all had to go gather up our kids to bring them home!!

Ah well... the serenity of the weekend’s wonderful memories will help make this hectic Monday more bearable!

Things That Go Bump In The Night

I’ve always been a pretty light sleeper. At University, that came in handy as a monitor in an all girls residence. We had a “no guys overnight during weeknights” policy and I could usually hear attempts to sneak them in. It also made falling asleep during weekends a bit hard since the music could blare until 2 am.

Bethany and Erin are both capable of yelling, screaming or speaking in full sentences while deeply asleep... any one of which usually sends me flying from bed on a Mom’s adrenaline rush to see if they are OK. Often, they don’t even wake up... but I head back to bed with my heart pounding.

Bethany, at four, seems more prone to bad dreams and even night terrors, many of which occur between 3 and 5 am. The closer to 5 am they fall, the harder it is to get back to sleep before our alarm goes off at 6:15. It is both heart wrenching and incredibly annoying. As a parent, I hate to think of my children feeling scared by their dreams. I still hate nightmares myself because they can seem so real and I also cherish the regular dreams I have. As an adult who often pulls nights on the computer until midnight, I sometimes resent having the sleep I do get interrupted... especially when getting back to sleep is tricky.

In those wee hours of the morning, I often find myself thinking of new designs or stories. At first, I would try to hold onto them until morning... but after a few frustrating times of not being able to remember a really good verse that I had worked out, I started to keep a little black sketchbook and pen near my bedside table so that I could capture enough of the idea or words to keep until morning.

I scribble stuff down in the dark, so as not to wake Nick, and sometimes the results are pretty hilarious to look at in the light of day, but the basis for what I need is there, captured on paper. Nick has teased me before that it is a bit like living with a gerbil. He sometimes hears this little “scritch, scritch” noise in the dark (anyone who has ever heard a gerbil gnaw a toilet paper tube at night will know what he means) which he has learned to just ignore and go back to sleep!

The saying “things that go bump in the night” always makes me smile... because usually, that refers to ME!