Light and Warmth In the Darkness...

It is the darkest day of the year for my faith, this Good Friday. A day when light and warmth can seem very far away if you let them.

Yesterday was ice rain, rain and slick roads for most of the day. This morning is sideways snow and spring seems hopelessly far away.

Yesterday morning, my mother had to go to the hospital with an irregular heartbeat and it has turned out to be a bit more serious than we hoped. She will be in ICU for the Easter weekend.


It would be so easy to give in to despair...

It would be easy to get into the Easter candy early...

Life is seldom easy!

I can remember looking at grown ups as a child. I thought they were so lucky to be able to stay up as late as they wanted, earn their own money to buy things and pick what gets cooked for dinner.

As an adult, I know that many of us don’t get enough sleep, have bills to pay and grab something to eat on the go which may not be the best for our health.

Life is not about how easy your path is, but how you travel it.

Do you look around you at the scenery and appreciate the beauty that you find around you or are you always looking for a shortcut or envying other roads?

Do you take time to speak to people along the way, stop and give directions, point out neat spots to others, share part of your sandwich with someone who is hungry, play 20 questions and listen to the radio at full blast when a great song comes on... or are you racing to your destination with a speed and intensity that lets nothing distract you?

The dark times remind us to treasure all that is precious... to rely on the hugs of friends... to say “I love you” more often... to count the many blessings that we do have... and to remember that after the darkness comes the brilliance of the dawn.

Things I Am Learning with Nick Away...

Being a single parent in the midst of report card season, pre-Easter activities and upcoming school holidays has taught me a lot this week. I need to make myself smile tonight, so here’s what I’ve learned while Nick is up in the Yukon helping organize his father’s funeral.

1) My kids will eat almost anything for supper if I convince them it is something new and unusual that Dad might not let them do if he were here.

2) I can let off steam to unsuspecting telemarketers who call during supper hour.

3) All 6 of my stuffed animals on Nick’s side of the bed along with the pillow bolster do NOT compensate for his body weight. I am waking up in the middle of the bed doing a dead man’s float and snoring... how attractive!

4) It feels strange not to have anything of his in the laundry pile.

5) I’ve gone back to wishing I could stuff myself through a phone line so that I can hug him in person... just like I did when we were dating long-distance.

6) I’m starting to talk to the hamster again for adult conversation.

7) I am more ruthless with the paper clutter on the counters. Shredding things into pieces or scrumpling them into wads is good therapy and keeps me from biting my fingernails or getting into the chocolate.

8) If I must get into some chocolate, baking chocolate chip cookies with my girls can be justified as a math lesson, a chance to learn a necessary life skill, a bonding experience and much more. Making sure that at least half of the cookies go out the door to an event also keeps me from eating the rest when they are at school!

9) There really is nothing good on TV late at night!

10) If I read until very late at night, and get really, really tired, I don’t jump at ever creak and groan the house makes in the middle of the night. The only problem is that the next morning, all the creaks and groans come from me!

Goodbyes Are NEVER Easy...

How quickly life can change in a heartbeat...

A few hours after I blogged last night, Nick got word that his father had taken a turn for the worse and was slipping away, so instead of going to bed, we headed downstairs to the computer, booked a flight for him, packed, made some calls and got him out on the 6 am flight this morning for a 17 hour trip from Moncton, New Brunswick to Whitehorse, Yukon.

If there were a longer route to get from point A to point B in our country, I’d be surprised. Nick went Moncton to Toronto, Toronto to Vancouver on the other coast of our country and then Vancouver up north to Whitehorse. Find them on a map and you’ll see just how far he had to race to get to his Dad’s side.

Sadly, he didn’t make it in time.

As I write this, Nick is somewhere in the air between Vancouver and Whitehorse. He woke with a start from a power snooze on the second leg of the flight somehow knowing that it was too late. He called me from Vancouver once he landed to touch base and I had to let him know that he was right.

Luckily, Nick was able to speak to his father late last night before he left and tell him that he loved him and that he was on his way. There are many who don’t get that chance to say goodbye in time.

My girls have cried themselves out as you do with that first huge loss of someone you love in your life. I have spent the day trying to be strong for them, holding down the fort and just aching for Nick and the loss he is facing... but he is where he needs to be right now. He will be able to help his stepmother through the next few difficult days once he arrives tonight.



Luckily, both my girls were able to have fond memories of Ken and Colleen’s visit here for Thanksgiving in 2006 when his health was already starting to fail. Did it hurt more because they got to know him despite the distance or will the memories comfort them? Despite the pain that they are feeling now, I know that they will carry the good forward with them. How can it be a bad thing to know that you were loved?



I worry that Nick’s shoulders, who are always so strong for others, are still recovering. I hope that somehow he can find moments to rest amid this new round of chaos and that from this sadness, some healing will come as he pays his final respects to his Dad.

I called mine tonight to remind him of how much I love him.

Luckily, Ken is no longer in pain.

Never forget to say those “I love yous” as often as possible. We don’t always get to plan when we have to say goodbye.

Goodbye Ken.

Back From March Break!

We’ve been home a week from a fabulous (if somewhat slower paced) trip to London, England for Spring Break. Now that the snowstorms, jet lag, time change and laundry are done, I can finally get caught up on e-mail, blogging and other fun news!



The proofs for Owen & The Dinosaur looked great. The author and I poured over them and signed off on everything (with a few corrections or spots to watch out for) and so now I just have to sit back and let them print the copies! We’ve set the date of the book launch here in Moncton for April 12th at the Magnetic Hill Zoo from 1 to 3 pm. Like many zoos around the world, they are celebrating 2008 as the year of the frog to bring attention to water quality and other threats to habitats. Since dinosaurs did end up extinct and frogs are about as close as we could come since none of our museums in the city have much in the way of fossils, we decided this was the closest fit. One dollar from every book sold during the launch will be donated to this cause at the zoo!

I managed to get the website updated today as well to include the calorie-free Easter treat that I’d been promising. I had such fun doodling little dragonlets with bunny ears that I even have next year’s planned already. Actually, next year’s may involve a contest as well and I will post the chart earlier. If you wander over to our web site’s newsletter right now, you’ll be able to get your claws on the 2008 Easter Dragonlet and stitch it up before next weekend. I know you... you stitchers are FAST... MUCH faster than this dragon!

Tomorrow is the last session of swimming lessons for the girls which is good because Erin’s volleyball is switching into high gear. I think we have tournaments almost every other weekend until the Nationals/Easterns are held here in May. I foresee a lot of stitching and knitting on the sidelines!

It’s DONE!!!

If I had more energy, I would skip around the house in a mad dragon dance of glee... but I have discovered that I just can’t do without sleep as often as I used to in my 20s!

Instead, I am sitting with a warm mug of tea in my claws and purring happily to myself. Ok, maybe dragons rumble with contentment instead of purring... but you get the idea.

All the files for Owen & the Dinosaur have made it safely to the printer’s. They will take care of getting the colour proofs ready while I take some time off and enjoy Spring Break with my family. Yesterday’s snowstorm made it feel anything BUT spring like, however the day off school meant that Nick could get a bit more rest. His balance is still going wonky at the darndest times. He’s been back at school this week but trying to take it a bit easy (as much as a Principal can when they are in the building ) but he’s VERY tired when he gets home at night!

I’ve been working on the website updates for March and they should be posted before lunch time tomorrow, including the announcement of the winners from our name the dragons contest and information about the Easter present for stitchers this month... a tiny dragonlet with bunny ears and a basket. It will go up on the site on March 16th so that all you speedy stitchers can get some done in time for the next weekend. Another great treat with no calories!

If I am quiet here for a week or so, know that I am fine. I am resting, recharging and spending some MUCH needed time with my family! Yawn..... This dragon is WAY to tired to stay up and watch Survivor tonight!

Beating My Head Against The Screen ...

This is the most frustrating part of the whole book process!

The drawings are all done... they looked fine when scanned in at 600 dpi... but then when I need to convert them to CMYK for the printing process, each page turns into MONSTER FILES that are 265 MB and up!

My poor older Mac running Photoshop 2.0 just doesn’t have enough memory to handle playing around with files that size unless I want to watch it think for 10 to 15 minutes between each command.

So...

Somewhere along the line, I have to compromise.

I hate compromising when it comes to the inner perfectionist’s sense of quality control.

I feel like I have been compromising and compromised all week!

I’ve done all the driving while Nick recovers his sense of balance, purchased birthday presents for parties, driven a rocking chair to school for a Rock-A-Thon, packed the sleeping bag, air mattress and other sundries for an Explorer sleep over, driven to volleyball practices & meetings, driven to doctor’s appointments.... until I am ready to scream!

When the going gets tough... the tough hide in the basement, stay up late and work in the peace and quiet once everyone else has gone to bed.

I am sure that when I hold the book in my hands, this will all be worth it....

but right now, there isn’t enough chocolate in the WORLD to ease this frustration!

Tests, Trials & Tribulations...

All of the drawings are done!



As with the last book, one coloured pencil barely held out until the very end. I may have to start a collection of teeny, tiny pencil bits in a jar as trophies!

I am amazed that I actually got them done considering all that has gone on in the last few weeks.

I had my test. Preparing for it was horrible... then I couldn’t eat for 48 hours. Did I ever mention that dragons get very grumpy when they aren’t fed?

The day of the capsule endoscopy test, they told me to dress in loose clothing. The only problem is that I don’t own any loose pants any more. I gave all my larger sizes away when I lost my weight 6 years ago... so I had to borrow a pair of Nick’s. I headed off to the hospital and they hooked me up. Here’s how attractive I felt....



Here’s a peek at the cool belt that held the data recorder for 8 hours during the test. It recorded everything that the camera sent during its trip through the dragon. I kept waiting to hear Miss Frizzle announce another field trip on the Magic School bus every now and then...



Here’s how many wires and pads were hooked up to the dragon underneath the loose shirt. Pulling them off at the end of the test made the dragon roar a bit. They were so sticky that I am still scrapping off little patches of grey adhesive almost 2 weeks later in a few spots.



The dragon was VERY happy to get this test over with. No children or husband were eaten in the process... but it was close. Even dust bunnies under the couch were looking tasty!



Last week, we had more snow storms roll through. Monday the 11th probably should have been a snow day because the wind was wicked and the snow was blowing sideways. A few buses came close to going off the roads and one or two school buses did run into trouble but no one was hurt. Wednesday the 12th, there was a storm that brought snow then freezing rain and then rain all in one day. The roads were horrid and school was canceled, so my whole family did the happy dance while I tried to work with everyone underfoot. Wednesday night the temperature plunged and everything turned into a giant skating rink. The stores started running low on salt and sand as everyone tried to cope. Thursday morning school was canceled because there was very little traction whatsoever. Again with the happy dance... though the girls got a bit grumpy when I actually made them work on the projects they had due and had put off the day before due to snow day glee and a massive Barbie game. I am such a mean mommy dragon!

Friday morning everyone was back at school for belated Valentine’s Day events and projects that were due. I drove Nick up to work, took both girls and their projects as well as Teacher Appreciation Week baking to the school. Bethany’s class had to make robots (not working ones) and she made an adorable bunny that scooted around on coaster. Can you believe in all the chaos that I forgot to take a picture before it went to school? I hope it comes back in one piece! Bethany was also heartbroken to learn that her teacher had fallen on the ice and broken her wrist the day before, requiring surgery to fix it! Poor Madame! (Bethany is in French Immersion)

I headed off to one of the local schools with my portfolio to fill in for a rescheduled author and illustrators day. One of the presenters had been unable to make it on the Friday and I was a fill-in. I had a great time right up until lunch when I got the call to come to the office.

Nick had been trying to get a bunch of kids to come in off some dangerous ice on the playground at his school when his feet went out from under him. The Vice-Principal was calling to let me know that Nick had split the skin on the back of his head and that they were taking him to the Emergency Room. Needless to say, the last hour of presentations was a bit of a blur. I raced to the hospital as soon as I was done (after calling my Mom in a panic to meet the girls at the bus stop). The ER was full of broken limbs, cracked ribs and other “slip & fall” injuries including one other man with a wound almost identical to Nick’s! 6 hours, 9 stitches and a “mild concussion” later, I brought my poor hubby home. I decided not to post the totally gross picture of his stitches that I took with my digital camera so that he could see what the back of his head looked like. It made him quite woozy... and I don’t want to do the same to any blog readers!

The weekend was a blur of taking care of Nick and working on drawings, getting ready for Sunday School, youth group a concert and the last part of volleyball tryouts for Erin. There is a new provincial-level team for girls 14 & under that she’d tried out for on Thursday night. She was good enough to be asked to go with 7 of the other girls to play in a tournament on Saturday that needed one more team to round things out. The girls met for the 1st time that morning, practiced a bit together and... went on to win the gold medal and the whole tournament! Erin was VERY proud and is thrilled to have officially made the team as of last night.



This morning was more snow, freezing rain and then POURING rain for about 6 hours. The streets are skating rinks once again with an inch or two of water on top of all the ice. We’ll have to watch the weather for the next few days and hope the temperatures stay ABOVE freezing until more of this horrid stuff melts.

I am SO glad to have all the drawings done. Now I just have to take them to be scanned tomorrow and build the final versions of the pages in the computer. The end is in sight...

The Looming Deadline Dragon...

Have you ever felt a deadline breathing down your neck? With less than 10 drawings left to complete for the book, it seems like I just can’t make my hands draw fast enough. When the going gets tough, I have to be extra careful not to push the hands to the point where they shake and ruin a drawing... because with paper and pen, you can’t just push the “UNDO” command on a keyboard!

I managed to get the website updated for February at last, so I think January just slipped into the same black hole that eats socks out of the dryer. I also got all of my class proposals organized for the fall show in Toronto. As soon as I hear which ones get accepted, I will post details and titles on our website to tempt you!

Dad is now out of the hospital and seems to be on the mend. It is SO hard to be far away when stuff like this happens. I can’t just drive across town or head up the street the way I can with our other parents. Both my father and Nick’s live very far away from us, even though they are close in our hearts. It is hard not to be able to see them when they are hurting!

Grant underwent surgery yesterday because a liver was found (just as things were getting very dicey) so all those prayers must have helped! We are waiting to hear details today, but the surgery went well, he got to keep his spleen and now we hope he will be on the road to recovery. Please keep him in your thoughts as his body recovers from this huge operation.

I go through another test on Monday (hopefully the last for a while) called a Capsule Endoscopy where I get to swallow a tiny camera in a pill and wear a special vest to record the data it transmits as it passes through my system. This will hopefully give them the details they need to rule out one more health mystery. Given what Dad has been through with his colon cancer, I don’t mind them being thorough in my case to make sure nothing is brewing inside. I only wish that I didn’t have to drink two more rounds of that lemon-flavoured battery acid they get you to take before hand. I will be a very grumpy, feeling sorry for myself dragon Sunday night and Monday morning.

Now I just need to draw as much as possible over the weekend!

Finding My Balance...

Slowly, but surely, I am finding my balance... even when life seems to want to make me tip over.

I am learning to say no, to lift less things if any, to listen to my body, to eat right and to hug those I love more often. This week has been a perfect reminder of why that is so important.

My Dad is back in the hospital. His last chemo treatment was so rough on his body that he can’t eat and was dropping weight so fast that they needed to get him on an IV and feed him that way. It was hard to talk to him on the phone and hear how weak he sounds. The treatments are so hard on his body. I’m not ready to say goodbye to my Dad yet!

I’m not ready to say goodbye to a friend either! I found out this week that Nanny Kay has pancreatic cancer. I will forever be grateful to this wonderful lady for her encouragement and the chance to illustrate a first children’s book. How can this be happening when she still has so many stories to tell? I spent most of the fall in terror that my own health crisis was going to reveal something horrible. While I have certainly had to make quite a few changes to my life in the past 2 months... degenerative disc disease won’t kill me!

Bethany was home sick yesterday after running a high fever the night before. I’ve been feeling somewhat panicky about focussing so much attention, time and billable hours on the book lately as we race to get it ready to publish. Doing less freelance work for paying clients means less income coming in. Yesterday, however, when Bethany was feeling so sick, I was able to work on drawings at the dining room table and get up to check on her every time I needed a stretch or she needed something. If I’d been working full-time OUTSIDE the home, we’d have run into the same chaos & tough decisions that so many working parents face.

I have been so busy working on OWEN & THE DINOSAUR and learning to draw in shorter bursts that I’ve hardly had the computer on at all. What a strange thing in this digital age!



I’ve only got 9 drawings left to complete before we do the computer layout and get the book off to the printer’s. I’d originally hoped to get it to them by the end of January, but given all the turmoil of the fall, I’m not as far behind as I feared.



Because the drawings will be scanned in on a scanner that can handle 11 x 14” sheets of paper, I’ve been batching smaller drawings onto the same page to save money. It does confuse some people when I show off the pictures...



but it certainly lets me keep the style and colours more consistent.



I love putting lots of detail into the pictures...



One of the biggest challenges was redrawing the watercolour that I’d originally sent to Nimbus Publishing (to show two different styles) along with the coloured pencil character sketches. The dinosaur had changed a bit to be more appealing and a bit less scary.



First I retraced the pencil sketch onto drawing paper and began to put the coloured pencil layers in. The composition changed a bit as we focussed more on Owen and the dinosaur.



After all the coloured pencil layers were done, it was time to add the brush markers on top to help blend things together and add more vibrancy to the colours. Here, the sky and water have already been done, but nothing else.



Once all the marker layers have been done, it is type to ink in the detail. This is the opposite of comic books or animation where the inking is done first. If I ever learn to do this in the computer, I’d probably to the line art first, but my hands still do what I want better this old fashioned way than in my computer. It is just such a slow process!!



This close-up shows how much the black pen details make Owen stand out compared to the rest of the drawing...



Ever so slowly, more and more details and outlines get added in. If I feel my hands or back getting tired during this stage, I make sure to take a break because one slip of the pen could be a total disaster!!



Finally, all the inking is done and the piece is complete. It looks very different from the bold hues in the watercolour, but it certainly matches the rest of the book much better now. I also like this version of the dinosaur much better than my original. This dino I would bring home!



I finished off the other large beach drawing shortly after to keep my colour palette the same and avoid having one pencil or marker wear out.

I also had great fun doing this cartoonish picture of Owen. It comes at a place in the book where he’s explaining to the dinosaur that he used to be afraid of the dark, so the cartoony style is to show how he’s remembering the event.



There's most of what I’ve been up to. I also put in two class proposals for the TNNA show in Columbus to see if I will be teaching during that trade show, I wrote an adorable poem for a design called “Dragon’s Lullaby” which I will teach first at the CreativFestival next fall and plotted with Teresa for what joint class we’d teach in Toronto next October. Now I just have to submit all my CSNF class proposals before the end of January.

Did I say that I’ve been finding my balance? I think I need a nap!

One small gift...

This magical heart appeared on our kitchen window during the last snowstorm. Over the holidays, we had 4 storms in 7 days! I took a picture of it before the back window snow thawed out, not knowing how appropriate it would be for this blog.

I got in to see my doctor late last week and finally have some news to share. The pathology reports aren’t back on some of the other internal issues, but the spinal CT scan was fairly conclusive. I have very little disk left between my L5 and S1 vertebrae and thinning disks at the L4 and L3 levels as well. My doctor suspects that one of the clusters of nerves that leads down to the right leg (one that goes around the front area which is less common) is being pinched and is causing the pain. Degenerative disk disease is something that I can learn to live with. Keeping my weight reasonable and doing exercises for my core region to strengthen back and abs will probably help. I will probably start sitting on my ball rather than my office chair at the computer. I also know that shoveling is NOT a part of my winter activities anymore. I tried to do a bit last week between storms and the agony the next 3 days was not worth the calories burned as exercise!

What really brings me here tonight are not by own health concerns, but those of a close friend’s son. Grant has been waiting for a liver transplant for most of his 16 years, but things are getting critical. He is at the Sick Kids hospital in Toronto with his parents who are struggling to be brave as time seems to be slipping away from them. Prospects for livers are so slim right now that they are putting out a call for a partial liver donation instead and spreading the word through friends and family. This procedure only involves giving up a portion of a liver from a living donor, since the liver is the only organ that can regenerate and grow.

If you haven’t ever talked with your family about organ donation or signed an organ donor card, PLEASE don’t wait another day! There is such a huge shortage out there and such a great need. That new life can come from tragedy or loss is one of the greatest gifts out there.

Your prayers for Grant would be appreciated. Regardless of which faith you celebrate, please take a few moments to hold this young boy and his family in your heart.

Wishes for Peace & Hope...

I had such great plans for 2007, especially how I wanted to celebrate the season on the new website and make it an exciting place for stitchers to visit. I also wanted to launch two exciting new ideas on New Year’s Eve so that when people visited our site on January 1st, they’d discover that the world of Dragon Dreams had expanded even more...

But all that is going to be put on hold for now.

All these tests I’ve been going through have picked up a few concerns that need to be addressed with a few rounds of more detailed exams that are going to take place fairly quickly in the New Year. I am just going to need to focus on a few less things for a tiny while, my health being the biggest one. The website newsletter will NOT be updated until after I get through the next round of tests in mid-January.

This has been going on for such a very long time and it is starting to wear the dragon down just a little, both physically and magically. 5 months of pain has been a long quest to endure, especially since they still aren’t exactly sure what is causing this or how to fix it! There are days when I wish I’d broken my drawing hand instead... because at least I’d have been out of the cast by now!

Your thoughts and prayers have been appreciated as well as the kind words or cards that keep popping up on days when I seem to need them the most. As a thank you, I wanted to send some wishes, prayers and goodies back to all of you, especially since I missed doing the fun stuff on the site all month long.

THE DRAGONS HAVE A NAME!

For all those of you who entered the contest to name the illustration and needlework dragons on our website, I have some winners.

The needlework dragon’s name is now HOOPER (hoop-er) because it sounded so cute and WAY too many of you suggested Flossy. It was a natural choice, but it was also the name of the cow in too many fairy tales that I read as a child to win. Beth P. Skott was the clever person who came up with that name.

The illustration dragon’s name is PIGMENT. Several of you (including Beth) submitted that entry, so I had to do a random draw and Elaine Long was the winner for that suggestion.

Thanks to everyone who submitted their great name ideas!



A GIFT OF PEACE...

I have learned over the past few months to treasure those moments of peace whenever they land in your lap. A sunrise, a quiet moment with someone you love, staring in wonder at the falling snow or the beauty of the decorated tree. I’ve also had moments when a sense of peace was shattered suddenly by a stab of pain. I know that there are many of you out there going through things that are FAR worse and corners of our world that are in far more turmoil than my life. My wish is that PEACE could spread a little farther this year, anger dissipate a little quicker and healing happen where it is least expected.


A TASTE OF SOMETHING SWEET...

I’ve tried to keep some things normal in our family this holiday season and the chance to bake has been one of them. I’ve actually adapted one of my favourite recipes and given it a new holiday twist which I share with all of you here to enjoy. These squares are VERY rich so they can be cut quite small. Feel free to pick other toppings that your family will enjoy.

THE DRAGON’S HOARD BARS

INGREDIENTS: • 2 cups of margarine, melted
• 1 cup of sugar
• 4 cups of all-purpose flour
• 2 14-ounce cans of sweetened condensed milk
• 2 cups of semisweet chocolate chips
(whole 12 oz. pkg.)
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract

TOPPINGS: • 5 crushed Candy Canes
• 1 cup white chocolate chips
• 1 cup Skor toffee bits
• 1 cup Chippit caramels
• chopped nuts, coconut or anything else fun that
you are hoarding!


1. Preheat oven to 350° F. Melt the margarine in the microwave and pour into mixing bowl. Add sugar and flour and mix with fork until crumbly and well combined. Press most of the mixture into an ungreased 13 x 9 x 2 inch glass baking dish or baking pan (slightly different results. I use the pyrex/glass one) to form the bottom crust. Save just under a cup to crumble on the top.

2. In a medium saucepan, combine the sweetened condensed milk and the chocolate chips. Stir over low heat until the chocolate melts completely and the mixture is smooth. Remove from heat. Stir in the vanilla. Spread evenly over the crust and then crumble the remaining crust mixture on top of the chocolate filling. Sprinkle all of your hoarded toppings on there as well until very little chocolate filling shows.

3. Bake in the preheated oven for about 35 minutes or until topping is golden. Cool in pan on wire rack. DO NOT CUT into squares until completely cool. If you need to speed up the cooling process, you can put the pan into the fridge once it has cooled for about 20 minutes at room temperature. Makes 40 - 50 squares when cut small.



A GIFT OF HOPE...

We all need to keep hope alive and burning brightly in our hearts, no matter what. I am writing this on the darkest night of the year with candles lit to celebrate that light, like hope, can shine in the darkness and not be overcome.

Whatever this season holds, whatever you are facing, do not give up hope. That is one of the things that sets us apart from all other creatures... our ability to dream and imagine and pray and hope.

I hope that the New Year waiting just around the corner is filled with more adventures, more wonder, more creativity and more love than you can imagine. That the answers you seek will be found, that the dreams that inspire you will be shared to make this world a better place and that no matter what may lurk around the corner or under the bed, you will keep hope with you on your journey, like a magical, friendly dragon to scorch all your troubles to ashes and curl about you on cold, bitter nights to keep you warm.

Cookies Taste Better Than Barium!

It was still dark and bitterly cold when I left the house this morning. That kind of deep, crisp cold that almost steals the breath from your body. I’d been fasting since last night and headed off to the hospital for yet another test. This time, I had to swallow the chalky-tasting barium for an upper GI. I got to the hospital, slid into a parking spot, dumped lots of coins into the meter and headed in. I got dressed in one of those flattering gowns that are never quite long enough and always seem to be on the verge of a wardrobe malfunction. The perky nurse told me that I could keep my boots and panties on... so I am sure that I made quite the picture; a 6’5” dragon in a short robe and clompy winter boots knitting a scarf as she waited for the radiologist to arrive. I bravely downed the fizzy gas crystals and the huge barium milkshake, then climbed on the table. At least this time, the machine was on was long enough... though I did almost have a Janet Jackson moment when they told me to roll over completely to coat the inside of my stomach! I “vogued” all my poses and mistakenly thought that was it. The next thing I knew, they were giving me ANOTHER cup of the icky white stuff (though not nearly as horrid as the lemon flavoured battery acid stuff from two weeks ago!) and told me to go sit outside for 45 minutes to let it move through me.

Apparently, dragons have slow digestive systems. Every half hour, they kept putting me on a different table and taking another X ray to see if things had moved “far enough through”. After being there for over 2 hours, I scooted out with my johny shirt under my coat, my jeans barely zipped and my hat askew to pump more money in the meter. Had I realized I was going to be there for over 4 hours, I would have parked the van in the lot!

Finally, the powers that be decided that perhaps tall dragons needed more vile stuff in there if they were slightly taller insides too... so they brought me another milkshake which I bravely downed. By this point, the nurses could see that I was shivering slightly and brought me a nice warm blanket to put over my long legs while I knit more on the scarf. Thank goodness for knitting to keep me sane! I even got 3 other ladies hooked on the possibility of just picking out some cool wool, casting on 16 stitches and just knitting again for the first time in years. Heh! Heh!

At long last a very HUNGRY dragon climbed back on the original machine and let the radiologist maneuver the strange pod down to press on my belly and peer deep inside the well coated, frothy insides of the dragon. With a wink and a smile, they told me I could go home and get some breakfast at last!

A quick glance at my watch revealed that it was now 11:30 and that the parking meter had probably expired about 4 minutes earlier, so I scrambled back into my clothes and raced out into the cold. Luckily, the subzero temperatures also made it uncomfy for the meter men to be out ticketing people, so I leapt in the van, drove home, opened a tin and bit a cookie’s head off to make myself feel human again while I fixed lunch. The sun even came out amid some dark clouds, and I felt my mood lighten.



Cookies taste SO much better than barium. They even smile at you while you eat them!



Our family has a fond tradition of icing all our cookies at once in an evening of madness. I make up royal icing from the Bulk Barn mix and put it into lots of ziplock bags with food colour to give me the broadest range of icing colours possible, then we all sit down to ice them.



Being a rather OC traditionalist, I usually ice my sugar cookie trees and gingerbread men the same way every year because I love how they turn out. Wouldn’t Martha be proud??



Nick, on the other hand, has a unique style and sense of humour that is a madcap blend of Monty Python and Mister Bill... but colourful and lots of fun!



The girls always insist on decorating a batch of cookies for their homeroom teachers and bus drivers, so they come up with unique designs that are all their own.



Erin made this adorable reindeer from one of the candy cane shapes and I have already told her it is MINE... MY cookie! (I’ll consider it one of my Christmas presents!)



Icing all these cookies last night also kept my mind off the test today and gave me something to chew my frustrations out on when I came home at last! I even got Nick to pose in front of the tree with the trifle his Mother made before she left for Ireland to be with her sister for the holidays. It was a taste of his childhood that he had fun sharing with the girls and I after supper last night before I had to start fasting. It was good, but not as good as cookies.



Cookies taste SO much better than barium!!!

INSTANT WINTER!

Winter arrived in one fell swoop! Yesterday’s storm dumped almost 2 feet of snow (46 cm or 18 inches) on our city. Everything ground to a halt. Schools were canceled, meetings, buses pulled off the roads...

So why didn’t I blog, get the website updated etc.?

Well, I had three excited people bouncing around the house about having a snow day and I was a bit giddy myself since I had to cancel both meetings at Weight Watchers. I won’t get paid... but that’s OK.

Then, it took Nick almost 2 hours to clear out the driveway. I shoveled a little emergency path from our back door down off the deck which you can’t even really see in this picture.



It was frustrating not to be able to attack the snow with my usual gusto... but I don’t want to make anything worse. I can’t even strap on my cross country skies for a run which is just about driving me crazy!

Lastly, when that many people in our city are stuck at home with nothing to do, the Internet usage spikes to a crazy high and even high speed internet slows to what feels like a crawl.

So guess what? I just stayed cozy, baked my grandmother’s Oatmeal Brown Bread recipe (which only seems to work properly in a snowstorm) and drew the next batch of sketches for the book.

It won’t be a green Christmas this year!

Up and Around Again...

OK. I’m up and moving again after yesterday’s adventures and the horror of getting ready for the test. My kids will NEVER be able to get out of taking icky cough medicine again in their lives, because they have watched Mommy be brave and drink something that tasted like lemon-flavoured battery acid and burned all the way down.

The preparation really was worse than the procedure! They took a few samples to double check one area, but nothing really bad showed up, so one more thing to cross off the list! I am thankful that the doctors are being thorough and careful... but I truly hate being the case that is baffling them! The one funny part was not being allowed to go home until I’d had some big farts... I’ll have to cartoon a dragon fart sometime!

Someone sent me this link in an e-mail to make me smile and it worked! Can you imagine putting the costume on in the first place?

This weekend should be fun as we put up the decorations as this year’s Advent season gets underway. The Josh Groban Noël CD arrived just in time!

Busy and Sore...

When I’m quiet for a while on the blog, it usually means that I am either sore or busy. This past week has been both!

I went for another CT scan of the whole spinal area and again, did not fit the machine so much of the dragon’s long, long legs suspended out into space as I tried to brace my abs and hold the legs up as they ran me through the scanner. Now I know what a pattern feels like when it’s being copied! No unauthorized extra copies of me please!

I’ve also been working hard on a set of drawings for Owen and the dinosaur. I went through 2 or 3 days of hating what my hands were producing because I decided to go with coloured pencil and brush marker instead of watercolour. To me the differences are VERY obvious! I was mourning the loss of some of the things I can do with paint while savouring how much faster each drawing could go together because I didn’t have to wait for everything to dry before adding my ink details.... I’d worked myself into a lather when I met with the author to see which he preferred. He sat at the dining room table, looked at both... peered at them closer and told me that until I pointed out the details, he couldn’t see much of a difference!

Artists sometimes get so obsessed with detail that it gets in the way. I bet all creative types can be like that. Some stitchers worry so much about a mistake that seems glaring to them, they forget that most people won’t ever notice unless they point the mistake out.

This week is the most invasive test thus far and I go off all forms of pain medication tonight, eat lightly tomorrow and basically purge the dragon completely on Wednesday before the test on Thursday. I won’t go into details or doodle any cartoons unless something totally twisted comes to mind, but I might show off some of the drawings later this week, just to put some pictures up here. It always feels so naked when there are only words!

How Do Single Parents Do It?

I just don’t know how single parents do it.

Bethany was home sick today, so I adapted my schedule around her and tried to get done what I could. Nick is away until tomorrow night and I never really sleep well with half of the bed empty. I hope I never have to adapt.

The house is too quiet, even with both my girls sleeping soundly.

He sent me flowers and the dining room smells wonderful. Bonus points in the “He can do no wrong club” again. A present to make me miss his presence even more.

I’d forgotten just how much company the other adult in my family can be! Someone to talk to, decompress with and make a stand with. I find myself wanting to hold deep conversations with the dwarf hamster at almost 1 in the morning. Time for bed!

Kudos to all single parents out there who do this alone all of the time!

Back To Reality... and it's only taken me 3 days to blog about it!

There’s nothing like being away from it all to make coming back to reality a bit harder than usual!

Retreat was WONDERFUL! Nick drove Mom and I, with all our bags, up to Camp Wildwood on Friday night having left the girls with their grandfather, 2 pizzas to bake and some movies to watch. Friday night is always fun as stitchers stake their claims, set up their circles of chairs and pull out a project to work on that isn’t too hard on the head.



I decided that I was going to PLAY for this year’s ornament exchange. I’d been into Because You Count to pick up a wonderful array of buttons from Just Another Button Company. Here’s what I picked out:



I got out some fabric and just started to stitch, designing as I went. They fed us snacks, we got caught up on all the news and I just settled in to enjoy myself. Whenever I got uncomfy, I just got up and walked around a bit.

Saturday morning, we woke up to SNOW! Mother Nature decided to gift us with a little dusting of snow to put everyone in a holiday mood. We had breakfast and some of us drove off to a tiny local craft show. I bought a pair of wool socks to keep my dragon toes warm, some wonderful tole painted items and two Holiday pins made out of FIMO.

Once we got back to retreat, I taught my mother how to cross stitch. Most people were amazed that I hadn’t taught her before this...



I also autographed a few copies of Santa’s Dragon...



One of the ladies had made up stitching accessories to sell with an incredible variety of fabric. This one called to me. Is this my Mission Statement or what??



After working on my ornament for the rest of the morning, I needed a change. I pulled out the amazing Dragon Needle Felting kit that I bought at the CreativFestival in Toronto a few weeks ago created by Wendo van essen. Here’s how my dragon took shape...

First, I bent the wire and the pipe cleaner as the instructions told me to.



Next, I began to add the coloured fibre (wool fluff) around the wire to make a bit more of a dragon shape. Using an INCREDIBLY SHARP needle, I began to poke in and out of the fluff to turn it into felt. Is is a FUN sensation. Because of the little grooves in the Felting needle, you can almost feel it crunching as you poke into the fluff. The needle pulls out clean and then you stab it back in again. Wendo thoughtfully provides a piece of foam in the kit so that there is usually something between the fluff and your body parts to stop any over exuberant stabs through the fluff. USUALLY being the key word. Did I mention that the needle is very, very SHARP?



Slowly, but surely... my dragon began to take shape.

I had one moment of panic when he started to bear a slight resemblance to a purple dinosaur that used to be very popular in our household....



Adding the scales down the dragon’s back was fun!



Stitchers kept drifting over to see what I was up to or to check on my progress. One of them snapped this photo for me.



I tried to zoom in here to show you the needle, but it was mostly hidden by my hand. I’m probably not demonstrating the proper grip... but anything that lets you stab fluff without hitting your own flesh is probably a good grip!



Wendo does a great job of describing how to make the feet and hands for your dragon out of separate pieces. Mine ended up with less toes on each foot than her version, but each dragon is unique.



Her red dragon looked nice and fierce on the cover of the kit, but in the end, mine ended up looking very cute, cuddly and quite bottom heavy...

Meet BUDDY!



If you feel the need to felt a dragon of your own, just drop by Wendo’s Website!!


I also managed to finish my ornament for the exchange the next day and decided to call it “Snowy Wait”. The chart and instructions will be on our website (accessed through the newsletter) in December.



Sunday morning, we woke up to even more snow. Maybe calling my ornament “Snowy Wait” wasn’t such a good idea!



A fire was lit in the main hall and we all just curled up with our projects after a brief worship service. We paused at the eleventh hour for a minute of silence in honour of our veterans and recited the poem “In Flanders Fields” together.

Here’s a picture of Mom with what she got done on her dollhouse rug over the weekend... not bad for a first time stitcher! She’s MUCH faster than me!



We held our ornament exchange and had our last meal together at lunchtime. Here's Elizabeth, who has run the retreats all these years, beside the tree before the ornament exchange.



As soon as lunch was done, stitchers began packing up to head home on the snowy roads. The circles disappeared, the bits of floss and fluff were swept from the floor and we all headed back to reality.

Sorry that it’s taken until this afternoon to post about my adventures. I can already find myself dreaming about the next retreat!