Monday, November 01, 2004

Silences... Spirits... and Saying Goodbyes!

I’ve been quiet these days since getting back from Toronto. Partly because I needed some time just to hear myself think after the chaos of getting ready for the show. As an extrovert, I love to spend time with people like that... I get recharged in so many ways... and yet it still takes a lot out of me, so I think I just gathered in on myself for a while, unsure of what to say next.

There have also been two precious daughters that wanted a lot of attention once I got back and had lots of events & projects lined up. We got through parent/teacher interviews on Wednesday night and then I had the girls home with me for 2 days while there was no school. We carved SIX pumpkins this year and despite the awful drizzle tonight, most of them stayed light until the end. The girls and I had a very damp, chilly time trick or treating, but I popped them in the bath once we got back home and made them some Lipton soup before they sorted out their “loot” and scarfed down a few treats. It was a much better night that a year ago when I discovered that Bethany had broken out with her chicken pox 14 days after her sister as we were taking off her costume!

Silences sometime give us the break we need to really think about things. Last Monday night, I played for almost 5 hours at making an Inspiration Journal... a book of quotes and colours and things to read over when my batteries are feeling low. It uses a lot of the same techniques as scrapbooking... but the book itself is also the project. I had a blast just playing with colours, textures and lettering. It wasn’t something as work... just sheer play. Friday night, I made my second one as a tribute to a wonderful man in our church family who passed away this week. I wanted his family to know how much he had touched the lives of everyone in our family over the past year and let them know that we will miss him too. Today, we said goodbye to him in a glorious celebration of his life. The word funeral doesn’t quite fit. I sang in the choir and many of us kept the tears from flowing too heavily until we’d finished the last triumphant anthem. Then, it was safe to let the tears spill over. Erin found this death especially hard because at 9, she is just becoming aware that she too may have to face goodbyes like this someday. It made her sad to know that her friend, Sarah, had lost her grandfather. Not only did she ache for Sarah’s loss, she was shaken to think of how that might feel if she were to lose someone she loved that much. Sharing in the celebration of his life today and being there to give her friend a hug when most of the grown-ups were paying attention to each other seemed to really help.

Spirit is up at last on the website as a Halloween treat (though she’ll stay on the newsletter until December and then move to the samples page) and it feels odd to wrap up that series and say “goodbye” to it as well. It has been satisfying to create something that tried to encourage others to share their time or talents to make the world a better place.

As I move on to some new projects and challenges this month, I am going to try to get back into the habit of blogging. I find that when I let that , or my journaling, slip through my fingers and days run into each other, I am somehow more out of touch with myself..... and besides. The more my hands are on the keyboard, the less likely they are to raid the kids Halloween treats!

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