Sunday, May 13, 2007
It’s Mother’s Day and though it was a bit quiet because I am still getting my strength back, it was a wonderful day. It is VERY hard to believe that I celebrated my first Mother’s Day a dozen years ago! I love both of my girls and notice that every age just keeps getting better and better.
I spent a lot of time today being a mother... from helping sing an anthem in church to teaching Sunday School, from having a wonderful nap after lunch to helping Erin assemble a project on Hawaii that is due next week. She passed her Baby-sitting Course on Saturday with flying colours and has asked me to help her put together a flyer to hand out to some of our friends who have young children and two of the new families on the street. She has also been “asked to go out” by one of the boys in Grade 7 that she has been friends with for a while. Bethany also needed help getting all 8 of her new Brownie Badges put onto her badge scarf. It is very strange to suddenly notice that your children are growing up and experiencing things that you can still remember doing yourself so vividly. I really don’t feel old enough to have daughters of my own going through all these milestones!
On Mother’s Day, my thoughts also turn to the wonderful ladies in my life who have been friends and role models for me. My Mom not only gave me a loving example to follow of how to be a parent, she continues to be an example as I watch her with my kids. Someday, after all, I may be a grandmother too!
It can’t have been easy, going back to start a new career (especially one that is as much of a calling as the Ministry) and then becoming a single parent as well. The year that Mom started back to school, I was the same age that Erin is now. I was able to be a help around the house just like she is. As I begin to explore what else I may do in the fall when both girls are in school for the longer day, I can understand where Mom must have been. There really is a point where you begin to understand that your children don’t need you with the same intensity as they did when they were infants. In many ways, they may need you more, but not while they are attending school each day.
Mom also showed me that life can often lead to new adventures and unexpected wonders. She fell in love with John and married 20 years ago this summer. He has brought so much joy, love, music and laughter to our family that it is hard to imagine our lives without him... but I can still remember watching the depths of her sorrow as her first marriage crumbled. I learned about healing, acceptance and transformation from watching her not only survive and move on, but also rediscover new joys. After wanting a puppy all of her life, she and John also bought Maggie and jokingly refer to her as “the child they never had together”.
I am also blessed to have another Mother to celebrate this day and every day of my life... the one who brought my husband into the world. I grew up watching my own Mom’s great relationship with her own mother-in-law but quickly realized that there were a lot more horror stories out there than happy ones. I can honestly say that I am truly blessed when it comes to my other mother!
Mum is someone that I can talk to and ask advice from who doesn’t come with all the emotional baggage from growing up together. We are similar in many ways and she has made me feel loved, welcome and treasured in my own right, while still giving our family space to be ourselves. Perhaps it was her own experiences of having her mother-in-law living with her that gave her this sensitivity. She may never know how much I admire her courage and strength as well as her kindness and creativity. Leaving her family behind and coming to a new country with young children cannot have been easy. Working most of her life to help make ends meet and moving SO many times as Nick was growing up meant constantly starting over, making new friends and settling into new communities. Like my own mother, she found a second chance at love. She and Jerome built up a business to be proud of with their bed and breakfast, but also knew when it was time to sell it and switch to a slower pace. I say that with a bit of a smile because my amazing Mum continues to fill her days with quilting, knitting and fellowship as well as walks on the treadmill.
What amazing role models they provide!!
Thank you girls for a special day with lots of hugs, adorable handmade cards and the treat of eating lobster for supper!!
Thank you Mom for reminding me to celebrate life in all its glory each day that you have!!