Celebrating Your Country...
Tomorrow is Canada Day and we plan to celebrate it in the birthplace of Confederation, Prince Edward Island with some very good family friends. We’ve checked the tent, packed plenty of sunscreen and bug stuff, but I need to get my web site updated for the weekend before I go. Nick has taken off his watch for the summer since he officially finished at noon yesterday. This year may take a little longer to unwind from, but this weekend away should help.
For most of us in Canada and the USA, this weekend (Canada Day for us on the 1st and the 4th of July for my family and friends in the USA) is one of get-togethers, celebrations and also, some patriotic pride in our countries. This year, while I still feel incredibly glad and privileged to live in a democracy and in a country with as many resources, opportunities and wealth as Canada, I cannot suppress a twinge of regret.
Canada’s Health Care System USED to be the envy of many countries. We used to be a country that prided itself on taking care of our sick, our elderly, our poor... We used to be a country that built great rail and roadway systems, made sure that green spaces were protected, invested in science and education so that our futures would be bright...
Sadly, our country seems to be placing more emphasis on business above all, rewarding the friends of those in power and of cutting “costs” (ie. education, health care, etc.) while still wasting MILLIONS of tax dollars on frivolous things.
My girls are learning to speak out for causes they believe in and that they have a place in any democracy. They drew posters and we went as a family to a City Council Meeting to protest a land swap that will see over 23 acres of the park near us turned over for commercial development. They are frustrated that their lives are affected by a bunch of “grown-ups who don’t care about the bunnies and squirrels whose homes they’ll be hurting”. But they are also learning that their actions can be noticed. The whole group of supporters trying to stop this “done deal” clapped when the girls posters were praised in the council meeting.
What does it take to turn a country around? I’m not sure. I do know that it begins with each individual doing their best to make their town or community a caring one. It grows stronger every time that someone speaks out against injustice or tries to correct a wrong. ... and it blooms into something beautiful every time a group of people remember to look towards the future with a vision for what a country could be instead of just reacting day by day, crisis by crisis. Let’s all take time to dream this weekend!!!
Thursday, June 30, 2005
Friday, June 24, 2005
School’s Out For The Summer!
I remember that ineffable sense of freedom. Coming home on the last day of school with my report card in hand and the sense that the whole summer stretched before me full of possibilities to play, sleep in, read and draw.
Today was a blaze of summer glory, despite a weatherman’s prediction of thunder showers and rain. The girls brought home their report cards and bags of papers that look as if they have been shoved into desks all year long. Our neighbourhood gang of bus stop moms and kids gathered at one person’s house (thankfully not mine this year) for a party this afternoon as we nibbled on wonderful food and watched the kids race around with water-soaked sponges to lob at each other or bounce on the trampoline. The kids topped off the party with bowls of ice-cream sprinkled with “pop rocks”, a type of candy that fizzes and explodes in your mouth.
How different to look at summer through an adult’s eyes. Why do we lose that sense of wonder and play so easily? Is it because our routines are interrupted without school to keep things on schedule? Is it because most adults wish that they too could have a long summer to rest, recharge and just play? Perhaps we tend to romanticize that freedom a bit as well because I can remember all too well those mornings of sheer boredom once I had run through my initial list of things that I wanted to do. How long will it be until I hear my girls complain that “There’s NOTHING to DO!!” ???
After my rant and sadness at the beginning of the week, I come full circle to a sense of peace. I have had the files removed from the site thanks to a supportive contact in Russia. I have let my colleagues know about who can help protect their designs and even if those files spring up somewhere again, I have stood up for my rights. I only wish that one of the infringers who really felt they were doing nothing wrong had the courage to use their own identity so that we could see who a court of law would side with. I guess that is why so many of them lurk behind false identities and petty words.
I also have a sense of Joy and Wonder. Dragon of the Deeps has been such a pleasure for me to stitch. Even though I am painfully slower than my model stitchers, it has given me great satisfaction to watch this design come to life beneath my needle. I can’t wait to see what the reaction will be to this pattern in Charlotte. I am also glad that I have a career where I will be able to enjoy some of the summertime with my children, even if it means doing most of the work at night or when they spend some time playing together. They are at such a fun age!!
So here is a toast to the arrival of summer holidays for our family. I can’t wait until Nick joins us after HE finishes working on Wednesday!!
I remember that ineffable sense of freedom. Coming home on the last day of school with my report card in hand and the sense that the whole summer stretched before me full of possibilities to play, sleep in, read and draw.
Today was a blaze of summer glory, despite a weatherman’s prediction of thunder showers and rain. The girls brought home their report cards and bags of papers that look as if they have been shoved into desks all year long. Our neighbourhood gang of bus stop moms and kids gathered at one person’s house (thankfully not mine this year) for a party this afternoon as we nibbled on wonderful food and watched the kids race around with water-soaked sponges to lob at each other or bounce on the trampoline. The kids topped off the party with bowls of ice-cream sprinkled with “pop rocks”, a type of candy that fizzes and explodes in your mouth.
How different to look at summer through an adult’s eyes. Why do we lose that sense of wonder and play so easily? Is it because our routines are interrupted without school to keep things on schedule? Is it because most adults wish that they too could have a long summer to rest, recharge and just play? Perhaps we tend to romanticize that freedom a bit as well because I can remember all too well those mornings of sheer boredom once I had run through my initial list of things that I wanted to do. How long will it be until I hear my girls complain that “There’s NOTHING to DO!!” ???
After my rant and sadness at the beginning of the week, I come full circle to a sense of peace. I have had the files removed from the site thanks to a supportive contact in Russia. I have let my colleagues know about who can help protect their designs and even if those files spring up somewhere again, I have stood up for my rights. I only wish that one of the infringers who really felt they were doing nothing wrong had the courage to use their own identity so that we could see who a court of law would side with. I guess that is why so many of them lurk behind false identities and petty words.
I also have a sense of Joy and Wonder. Dragon of the Deeps has been such a pleasure for me to stitch. Even though I am painfully slower than my model stitchers, it has given me great satisfaction to watch this design come to life beneath my needle. I can’t wait to see what the reaction will be to this pattern in Charlotte. I am also glad that I have a career where I will be able to enjoy some of the summertime with my children, even if it means doing most of the work at night or when they spend some time playing together. They are at such a fun age!!
So here is a toast to the arrival of summer holidays for our family. I can’t wait until Nick joins us after HE finishes working on Wednesday!!
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
FInding Hope Through Tears In Song...
The transition to reality after being away is never easy. At least the girls were excited enough about seeing their friends and all of the last week of school activities to get up out of bed even when their bodies were still on EST.
The first day of summer here was glorious and the kids ran through “Ollie” an octopus sprinkler after school with some friends while the moms tried to stay out of the way and chat on the deck.
Not to bad... but then I needed to send an e-mail off to close down a Russian site that had 36 of my designs on their pages for trade or sharing. A Dragon Spotter had reported the site to me while I was up at Mom’s, but since I didn’t have my contact’s e-mail with me, I waited until I got home, not knowing how much was up on the site.
Tonight it drove me to tears. For whatever reason, I just sat there and bawled. At that moment in time I thoroughly understood Teresa’s decision to take a break from cross stitching. Why pour so much of yourself into a design and pay to have it printed when someone can steal it and share it will others so easily?
I took a break to watch this week’s Canadian Idol and called in to support the young girl from New Brunswick, but as I watched her chase her dream, I felt even more discouraged tonight that after almost a dozen years of designing, I certainly had far less to show for all my efforts in terms of financial stability than someone who had spent the same amount of time in another job. I called my Mom, just to have her say “awwwww”, which sort of helped, and then got down to work on some graphic files for a client.
I put iTunes on in the background on my other machine and one of the first songs that came up was from the Touched By An Angel CD... the song Testify to Love by Wynnona. When it hit the line of the words “Every corner of Creation lives to Testify” I felt oddly comforted with the sudden knowledge that I was being true to what I have always felt called to do... create images.
If the ones that I make in cross stitch are more vulnerable to technology, I will keep shutting things down, speaking out, trying to find ways of protecting my work better etc. I will also continue to explore other, less vulnerable ways of using my images, but I will not let this take away the joy that I have in creating things that try to make the world smile, or hope, or dream a bit more than they did before.
I will learn from and be inspired by those around me facing adversity with such incredible courage, instead of watching how the world encourages “having it all” regardless of who you hurt.
The transition to reality after being away is never easy. At least the girls were excited enough about seeing their friends and all of the last week of school activities to get up out of bed even when their bodies were still on EST.
The first day of summer here was glorious and the kids ran through “Ollie” an octopus sprinkler after school with some friends while the moms tried to stay out of the way and chat on the deck.
Not to bad... but then I needed to send an e-mail off to close down a Russian site that had 36 of my designs on their pages for trade or sharing. A Dragon Spotter had reported the site to me while I was up at Mom’s, but since I didn’t have my contact’s e-mail with me, I waited until I got home, not knowing how much was up on the site.
Tonight it drove me to tears. For whatever reason, I just sat there and bawled. At that moment in time I thoroughly understood Teresa’s decision to take a break from cross stitching. Why pour so much of yourself into a design and pay to have it printed when someone can steal it and share it will others so easily?
I took a break to watch this week’s Canadian Idol and called in to support the young girl from New Brunswick, but as I watched her chase her dream, I felt even more discouraged tonight that after almost a dozen years of designing, I certainly had far less to show for all my efforts in terms of financial stability than someone who had spent the same amount of time in another job. I called my Mom, just to have her say “awwwww”, which sort of helped, and then got down to work on some graphic files for a client.
I put iTunes on in the background on my other machine and one of the first songs that came up was from the Touched By An Angel CD... the song Testify to Love by Wynnona. When it hit the line of the words “Every corner of Creation lives to Testify” I felt oddly comforted with the sudden knowledge that I was being true to what I have always felt called to do... create images.
If the ones that I make in cross stitch are more vulnerable to technology, I will keep shutting things down, speaking out, trying to find ways of protecting my work better etc. I will also continue to explore other, less vulnerable ways of using my images, but I will not let this take away the joy that I have in creating things that try to make the world smile, or hope, or dream a bit more than they did before.
I will learn from and be inspired by those around me facing adversity with such incredible courage, instead of watching how the world encourages “having it all” regardless of who you hurt.
Sunday, June 19, 2005
Fatherhood...
It’s Father’s Day today and we have to head back home on the train tonight. The girls called Nick this morning, sad that they couldn’t be with their Daddy on Father’s Day and yet delighted to spoil their Grandfather, Grr. Not having had children of his own, he inherited my brother, sister and I in our late teens and has merrily thrown himself into the role of grandfather with complete abandon.
My own father gave me far more than someone to look “up” to (I still do because he tops me by almost 5 inches!) I learned how to dream impossible dreams from Dad, how to imagine worlds beyond our own through science fiction and fantasy, a love of travelling to new places and meeting new people and how to sing Tenor harmony to name a few of the things that spring to mind.
I was glad we had the chance to see my grandfather in Montreal this visit. It is wonderful to still be able to have a Grampy around in this year that I turn 40. I have been hoping all day that there will be some good golf on television for him to watch.
Father’s Day is also when I think about the people that cae into my life through my marriage to Nick. Since Nick’s parents also divorced and remarried, Ken and Jerome became new people to appreciate in our lives.
Today, half a world away, my brother Dave also celebrates Father’s Day with Owen Charles and Anne safely home from the hospital. I wish him sleep enough to be able to function at work tomorrow and the joy of having all of his now larger by one family under the roof together at last. Sleep will come again eventually!
I also think of my sister’s husband, Yoshi, who has embraced his role as uncle in a totally different culture with such grace and enthusiasm. Whether playing Barbies and Uno or discussing Pokemon and Disney movies with his nieces, he is adding a richness to their lives that they treasure.
Father’s Day is not just a celebration of biological procreation. It is a day to honour the many men in our lives who build us up, grant us wings, challenge us to be more than we are, soothe our souls, inspire us, nurture us, enchant us, make us giggle or simply add richness to the tapestry of our lives.
Happy Father’s Day!
It’s Father’s Day today and we have to head back home on the train tonight. The girls called Nick this morning, sad that they couldn’t be with their Daddy on Father’s Day and yet delighted to spoil their Grandfather, Grr. Not having had children of his own, he inherited my brother, sister and I in our late teens and has merrily thrown himself into the role of grandfather with complete abandon.
My own father gave me far more than someone to look “up” to (I still do because he tops me by almost 5 inches!) I learned how to dream impossible dreams from Dad, how to imagine worlds beyond our own through science fiction and fantasy, a love of travelling to new places and meeting new people and how to sing Tenor harmony to name a few of the things that spring to mind.
I was glad we had the chance to see my grandfather in Montreal this visit. It is wonderful to still be able to have a Grampy around in this year that I turn 40. I have been hoping all day that there will be some good golf on television for him to watch.
Father’s Day is also when I think about the people that cae into my life through my marriage to Nick. Since Nick’s parents also divorced and remarried, Ken and Jerome became new people to appreciate in our lives.
Today, half a world away, my brother Dave also celebrates Father’s Day with Owen Charles and Anne safely home from the hospital. I wish him sleep enough to be able to function at work tomorrow and the joy of having all of his now larger by one family under the roof together at last. Sleep will come again eventually!
I also think of my sister’s husband, Yoshi, who has embraced his role as uncle in a totally different culture with such grace and enthusiasm. Whether playing Barbies and Uno or discussing Pokemon and Disney movies with his nieces, he is adding a richness to their lives that they treasure.
Father’s Day is not just a celebration of biological procreation. It is a day to honour the many men in our lives who build us up, grant us wings, challenge us to be more than we are, soothe our souls, inspire us, nurture us, enchant us, make us giggle or simply add richness to the tapestry of our lives.
Happy Father’s Day!
Saturday, June 18, 2005
Missing The Connection...
Funny how sometimes being apart can make you appreciate someone even more. This has been a tricky year with Nick taking a Vice-Principalship at a rural K-12 school about 40 km (20 minutes) from home. We remained a one van family by choice, but that also meant juggling things around sometimes or the girls and I taking the occasional taxi. I also learned to cope with longer hours on my own with the girls. Most mornings, Nick left before 7 am and got home after 5 pm. I know this pales when compared to what most parents in major centers lose to commuting time etc., but it was quite a switch from the family schedule we had the year before.
Since I was lucky enough to marry my best friend, I also found it hard when I couldn’t do much to help him adjust to what was less than a welcoming atmosphere at the new complex. It made me mad to see how hard he was working to help solve problems and not really getting the support he needed. Especially when he had gone down to that school at the request of the District, giving up a nice position at a great school in order to help the District as a whole.
With the school year almost over, and the objectivity of having spent a week away at my Mom’s, I can now see what a great learning experience this year has been for Nick. Even the darker moments taught him things about how he will or won’t run a school once he has a chance to become a Principal. It has also re-affirmed for me why I chose the type of career that I did while the girls are younger, so that I can be there when they get off the bus and help them with homework etc. Yes, sometimes that means staying up late to complete work after they go to bed, but they won’t be this age forever. Rereading my Mom’s collection of For Better Or Worse comic anthologies has reminded me of that.
It is great to know that after almost 16 years of marriage and 21 years of being together, I can miss someone so completely. I have missed all of the chats with my best friend this week, even though we have tried to call each other amid the chaos. Nick very rarely gets that “alone head space” time that I do when I go to trade shows or have an empty house all to myself during the day to get work done. I hope it has been restful in some way for him as the hectic pace of school closing time tries to run all teachers ragged.
When you marry someone, you really do create a bond/fusion of two lives that, if you work hard enough, are lucky enough and support each other enough, stands apart from other family bonds. You remember and love those who gave you live and with whom you grew up. You love, nurture and raise your children until they go off to have lives of their own. But through it all, around it all and in spite of it all, remains the bond that you forge as the years go by. I can’t wait to get home to my friend, my partner and my love!
Funny how sometimes being apart can make you appreciate someone even more. This has been a tricky year with Nick taking a Vice-Principalship at a rural K-12 school about 40 km (20 minutes) from home. We remained a one van family by choice, but that also meant juggling things around sometimes or the girls and I taking the occasional taxi. I also learned to cope with longer hours on my own with the girls. Most mornings, Nick left before 7 am and got home after 5 pm. I know this pales when compared to what most parents in major centers lose to commuting time etc., but it was quite a switch from the family schedule we had the year before.
Since I was lucky enough to marry my best friend, I also found it hard when I couldn’t do much to help him adjust to what was less than a welcoming atmosphere at the new complex. It made me mad to see how hard he was working to help solve problems and not really getting the support he needed. Especially when he had gone down to that school at the request of the District, giving up a nice position at a great school in order to help the District as a whole.
With the school year almost over, and the objectivity of having spent a week away at my Mom’s, I can now see what a great learning experience this year has been for Nick. Even the darker moments taught him things about how he will or won’t run a school once he has a chance to become a Principal. It has also re-affirmed for me why I chose the type of career that I did while the girls are younger, so that I can be there when they get off the bus and help them with homework etc. Yes, sometimes that means staying up late to complete work after they go to bed, but they won’t be this age forever. Rereading my Mom’s collection of For Better Or Worse comic anthologies has reminded me of that.
It is great to know that after almost 16 years of marriage and 21 years of being together, I can miss someone so completely. I have missed all of the chats with my best friend this week, even though we have tried to call each other amid the chaos. Nick very rarely gets that “alone head space” time that I do when I go to trade shows or have an empty house all to myself during the day to get work done. I hope it has been restful in some way for him as the hectic pace of school closing time tries to run all teachers ragged.
When you marry someone, you really do create a bond/fusion of two lives that, if you work hard enough, are lucky enough and support each other enough, stands apart from other family bonds. You remember and love those who gave you live and with whom you grew up. You love, nurture and raise your children until they go off to have lives of their own. But through it all, around it all and in spite of it all, remains the bond that you forge as the years go by. I can’t wait to get home to my friend, my partner and my love!
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Our Family Just got Bigger!!!
What an exciting day! Owen Charles Aikman was born at 11:45 am this morning in Lausanne, Switzerland and we’ve already seen pictures via e-mail. The girls are thrilled to have a new baby cousin and “Aunty Dragon” is counting the days until I can hold my new nephew in August when my brother, his wife Anne, Juliette and Owen come to Ottawa for my cousin’s wedding.
I’ve been lucky enough to grow up in a family where connections are important and blood matters, but Nick and I have also had the wonder of having new people join our family as all of our parents remarried after divorces and in my case, I ended up with a new brother and sister!
Family can be ties of blood, but there can also be people who come into our lives and hearts who become as close or closer than family we are born into. The ties that bind us are what make our lives richer... and Owen Charles is the latest treasure in our lives. Welcome into this big, bright, wonderful world with all its adventures and challenges. I cannot wait to meet you in person and watch you grow up!!
What an exciting day! Owen Charles Aikman was born at 11:45 am this morning in Lausanne, Switzerland and we’ve already seen pictures via e-mail. The girls are thrilled to have a new baby cousin and “Aunty Dragon” is counting the days until I can hold my new nephew in August when my brother, his wife Anne, Juliette and Owen come to Ottawa for my cousin’s wedding.
I’ve been lucky enough to grow up in a family where connections are important and blood matters, but Nick and I have also had the wonder of having new people join our family as all of our parents remarried after divorces and in my case, I ended up with a new brother and sister!
Family can be ties of blood, but there can also be people who come into our lives and hearts who become as close or closer than family we are born into. The ties that bind us are what make our lives richer... and Owen Charles is the latest treasure in our lives. Welcome into this big, bright, wonderful world with all its adventures and challenges. I cannot wait to meet you in person and watch you grow up!!
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
Making The Time To Make Memories,,,
Considering that I will be turning 40 this fall, it is kind of impressive to still be able to visit my grandfather whenever I get back to Quebec. This morning, we packed up all of the ingredients for lunch, car toys, books, knitting (I get car sick if I stitch in the car, but my stitching came along too!) and headed off to Montreal, about 2 hours away from Sherbrooke. We ran into heavy rain and big city traffic about half an hour out of the city, so we were almost 40 minutes later getting to his house than we’d planned.
Grampy still lives in the house that he and my grandmother bought more than half a century ago. It is the only house from my childhood that I still have any tangible link to, since Nick and I have now lived longer in our own house than in any place we spent time as children. At 93, Grampy is getting a bit frailer and a bit more absent minded each time I see him, but what a gift for both of my girls to have such detailed memories about their great-grandfather. He was the one to inspire 3 other generations of art loving people and we had a great time doing some sketches to leave behind for him.
The brief hours of the visit flew by, but they were filled with hugs, photos, laughter and memory making moments before the long drive back to Sherbrooke. Was it worth spending the 4 hours on the road to be there today? Of course! Each visit is made more precious by the knowledge that this pilgrimage will not last forever. I spent time as an artist today capturing some of my favourite spots or architectural elements around the house forever on film, and time as a granddaughter, with my arms draped around thinner shoulders, capturing the moments and memories forever in my heart.
Considering that I will be turning 40 this fall, it is kind of impressive to still be able to visit my grandfather whenever I get back to Quebec. This morning, we packed up all of the ingredients for lunch, car toys, books, knitting (I get car sick if I stitch in the car, but my stitching came along too!) and headed off to Montreal, about 2 hours away from Sherbrooke. We ran into heavy rain and big city traffic about half an hour out of the city, so we were almost 40 minutes later getting to his house than we’d planned.
Grampy still lives in the house that he and my grandmother bought more than half a century ago. It is the only house from my childhood that I still have any tangible link to, since Nick and I have now lived longer in our own house than in any place we spent time as children. At 93, Grampy is getting a bit frailer and a bit more absent minded each time I see him, but what a gift for both of my girls to have such detailed memories about their great-grandfather. He was the one to inspire 3 other generations of art loving people and we had a great time doing some sketches to leave behind for him.
The brief hours of the visit flew by, but they were filled with hugs, photos, laughter and memory making moments before the long drive back to Sherbrooke. Was it worth spending the 4 hours on the road to be there today? Of course! Each visit is made more precious by the knowledge that this pilgrimage will not last forever. I spent time as an artist today capturing some of my favourite spots or architectural elements around the house forever on film, and time as a granddaughter, with my arms draped around thinner shoulders, capturing the moments and memories forever in my heart.
Sunday, June 12, 2005
The Magic Of Taking The Train...
The girls and I arrived safely in Quebec EARLY this morning after a wonderful train ride up to my Mom & John’s. Both girls just love taking the train, especially when we can get the bedroom with the 3 beds. When I looked at how long the school year was this year and how badly Nick needed time to do all the end of year paperwork, file writing etc., I decided that instead of going to Columbus and leaving him in charge of everything, I would pack up my work, pull the girls out of school for a week and leave him with an empty house, no fixed schedule and the chance to work late or eat out of a pot over the sink to save on dishes whenever he felt like it.
So as soon as Erin’s last school project for report cards was completed, we got ready to go! We boarded the train last night before supper in Moncton and waved goodbye to Nick, then settled into the sleeper room. Bethany has to take the couch that converts into the bed because I need place to hang my toes over the end of the other bottom bed and Erin always claims the upper bunk bed, but this time she was kind enough to let Bethany come up for a few minutes of play time.
Our meals were included on this section of the trip because the only way the 3 bedroom car was available was as part of a special “touring package”. It meant that we went down to the dining car for dinner (a luxury we probably would have avoided otherwise) for a wonderful gourmet meal. They did have a children’s menu for Bethany that offered her a small personal pepperoni pizza, a glass of cherry kool-aid and a pudding cup, but not being used to the rocking motion of the train caused an immediate kool-aid catastrophe on the first sip. Boom! Bright pink drink all over the nice white linen napkin in her lap and halfway down her shirt. She began to cry, of course, in that 6 year old mix of sadness & embarrassment spurred on my by cry of “Oh, Bethany!” but then a lovely waitress came over to comfort her and told her that often SHE was a mess by the end of the night if the train lurched while she was serving food! She brought Bethany another warm roll to munch on and made such an impression that Bethy went up to her later to say “Thank you for making me feel better!”.
After dinner, we went for a ride in the observation car to watch the sunset near the Baie des Chaleurs. Erin, or course, was hoping to see the famous burning ghost ship, while Bethany was more interested in the new game of Pokemon Emerald that I’d purchased for us to play on the trip. Knowing that excitement would keep them awake and wiggly, I didn’t push the jammies until almost 9:30. They wanted to have a paint the nails party, but I managed to explain that Mommy couldn’t possibly do a good job while the train was so wobbly. I am severely challenged at putting nail polish on when everything is still...
Finally, around 10:15, both girls each told me a story before I told them one and we all fell asleep to the rocking motion of the train. Waking up at 5:30 am to get a quick breakfast (also included in our ticket price...so worth eating) wasn’t too bad because Quebec is on EST... so it was 6:30 for us. I am sure that we’ll all be in bed early tonight!!
The girls and I arrived safely in Quebec EARLY this morning after a wonderful train ride up to my Mom & John’s. Both girls just love taking the train, especially when we can get the bedroom with the 3 beds. When I looked at how long the school year was this year and how badly Nick needed time to do all the end of year paperwork, file writing etc., I decided that instead of going to Columbus and leaving him in charge of everything, I would pack up my work, pull the girls out of school for a week and leave him with an empty house, no fixed schedule and the chance to work late or eat out of a pot over the sink to save on dishes whenever he felt like it.
So as soon as Erin’s last school project for report cards was completed, we got ready to go! We boarded the train last night before supper in Moncton and waved goodbye to Nick, then settled into the sleeper room. Bethany has to take the couch that converts into the bed because I need place to hang my toes over the end of the other bottom bed and Erin always claims the upper bunk bed, but this time she was kind enough to let Bethany come up for a few minutes of play time.
Our meals were included on this section of the trip because the only way the 3 bedroom car was available was as part of a special “touring package”. It meant that we went down to the dining car for dinner (a luxury we probably would have avoided otherwise) for a wonderful gourmet meal. They did have a children’s menu for Bethany that offered her a small personal pepperoni pizza, a glass of cherry kool-aid and a pudding cup, but not being used to the rocking motion of the train caused an immediate kool-aid catastrophe on the first sip. Boom! Bright pink drink all over the nice white linen napkin in her lap and halfway down her shirt. She began to cry, of course, in that 6 year old mix of sadness & embarrassment spurred on my by cry of “Oh, Bethany!” but then a lovely waitress came over to comfort her and told her that often SHE was a mess by the end of the night if the train lurched while she was serving food! She brought Bethany another warm roll to munch on and made such an impression that Bethy went up to her later to say “Thank you for making me feel better!”.
After dinner, we went for a ride in the observation car to watch the sunset near the Baie des Chaleurs. Erin, or course, was hoping to see the famous burning ghost ship, while Bethany was more interested in the new game of Pokemon Emerald that I’d purchased for us to play on the trip. Knowing that excitement would keep them awake and wiggly, I didn’t push the jammies until almost 9:30. They wanted to have a paint the nails party, but I managed to explain that Mommy couldn’t possibly do a good job while the train was so wobbly. I am severely challenged at putting nail polish on when everything is still...
Finally, around 10:15, both girls each told me a story before I told them one and we all fell asleep to the rocking motion of the train. Waking up at 5:30 am to get a quick breakfast (also included in our ticket price...so worth eating) wasn’t too bad because Quebec is on EST... so it was 6:30 for us. I am sure that we’ll all be in bed early tonight!!
Thursday, June 09, 2005
In A Perfect World...
• Meals would be nutritious, taste good and cook themselves.
• It would be more acceptable to be happy than rich.
• Garden beds would remain weed-free.
• Clothing would recycle into inert matter so that a machine could spit out a clean outfit
every morning that fit perfectly and was guaranteed to be a colour that you look good in.
• Technology would always work when you needed it to instead of causing you to want
to beat your head against the screen.
• People would have more respect for the world that sustains us.
• Grocery shopping could be done on-line and delivered to your door by a smiling
person who would have been as picky on your behalf with produce as you would
have been at the store.
• Schools and hospitals would have all the money they needed.
• There would be such a thing as Tribbles (but they wouldn’t reproduce that fast!)
• We would all finally realize that EVERYONE is “different” and that there is no “US”
because then there has to be a “THEM”.
• Chocolate would contain NO calories or fat.
• We’d ba able to see the real light show of the starry skies overhead every night, even
in the cities, to remember how very small a part we are of a much bigger picture... then
make a wish on the brightest star.
• Meals would be nutritious, taste good and cook themselves.
• It would be more acceptable to be happy than rich.
• Garden beds would remain weed-free.
• Clothing would recycle into inert matter so that a machine could spit out a clean outfit
every morning that fit perfectly and was guaranteed to be a colour that you look good in.
• Technology would always work when you needed it to instead of causing you to want
to beat your head against the screen.
• People would have more respect for the world that sustains us.
• Grocery shopping could be done on-line and delivered to your door by a smiling
person who would have been as picky on your behalf with produce as you would
have been at the store.
• Schools and hospitals would have all the money they needed.
• There would be such a thing as Tribbles (but they wouldn’t reproduce that fast!)
• We would all finally realize that EVERYONE is “different” and that there is no “US”
because then there has to be a “THEM”.
• Chocolate would contain NO calories or fat.
• We’d ba able to see the real light show of the starry skies overhead every night, even
in the cities, to remember how very small a part we are of a much bigger picture... then
make a wish on the brightest star.
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Roots and Wings...
I’ve been rushing around trying to get two out of print designs ready to switch over to the full colour cover format before I take the girls up to my mother’s for a week. School doesn’t end until the 27th of June here, but once Erin turns her last major project in tomorrow, most work that counts will be done. At this point, getting out of Nick’s hair so that he can get all the paperwork done before the end of the year at his school, spending time with my Mom and immersing the kids in French for a week far outweighs the stuff that they will miss at school.
Activities are also winding down at last. Erin’s piano recital was last week, Guide Camp amid swarms of nasty black flies was this past weekend (no, the dragon did not go and get bit this time!) Bethany’s Sparks closing was last week and Erin’s final Girl Guide meeting is tomorrow night (I guess I should now say tonight!). Luckily we have started writing everything on one central calendar. Last week, there was a conflict over events that we only discovered after it was too late to get a sitter!
Erin had been asked to try out for one local swim team and after two sessions, which she enjoyed immensely, we began to realize how tricky getting to the other side of town was going to be during rush hour traffic for a 6pm evening practice. Tonight, she went to the practice of the swim team that meets at Université de Moncton’s CEPS building. It is a bilingual swim team, but much of the coaching and instructions are done completely in French. She was determined to try swimming tonight even though she was still tired from camping this weekend so that she could have a second session with them on Wednesday night before we leave on Saturday to visit Quebec. By the time we get back, the pool will be closed for cleaning and the coach’s evaluation would have to wait.
I doubt I could explain how I felt tonight to anyone who has never been part of raising a child or watching one grow. I looked down at Erin trying her hardest in a new and challenging situation and felt this wave of admiration and astonishment. I felt a bit like a bird peering at the Mockingbird chick that hatched from the egg in the nest. Could this child who is constantly running, jumping and now hauling herself through the water in all kinds of strokes really be the child of someone who was always picked last for every team? I have only fallen in love with physical activity in the past 5 years. Before that, I always wanted to sit and read, draw or stitch.
I have two daughters that constantly amaze and enchant me. I hope I am always able to give them both roots and wings. I hope I can support them in their wild and crazy dreams, encourage them to at least try a new challenge to see if they like it and comfort them or help pick up the pieces when something truly becomes impossible or unreachable.
I’m still chasing new dreams in this my 40th year...
OK! This is getting too philosophical. Time for this dragon to head to bed!
I’ve been rushing around trying to get two out of print designs ready to switch over to the full colour cover format before I take the girls up to my mother’s for a week. School doesn’t end until the 27th of June here, but once Erin turns her last major project in tomorrow, most work that counts will be done. At this point, getting out of Nick’s hair so that he can get all the paperwork done before the end of the year at his school, spending time with my Mom and immersing the kids in French for a week far outweighs the stuff that they will miss at school.
Activities are also winding down at last. Erin’s piano recital was last week, Guide Camp amid swarms of nasty black flies was this past weekend (no, the dragon did not go and get bit this time!) Bethany’s Sparks closing was last week and Erin’s final Girl Guide meeting is tomorrow night (I guess I should now say tonight!). Luckily we have started writing everything on one central calendar. Last week, there was a conflict over events that we only discovered after it was too late to get a sitter!
Erin had been asked to try out for one local swim team and after two sessions, which she enjoyed immensely, we began to realize how tricky getting to the other side of town was going to be during rush hour traffic for a 6pm evening practice. Tonight, she went to the practice of the swim team that meets at Université de Moncton’s CEPS building. It is a bilingual swim team, but much of the coaching and instructions are done completely in French. She was determined to try swimming tonight even though she was still tired from camping this weekend so that she could have a second session with them on Wednesday night before we leave on Saturday to visit Quebec. By the time we get back, the pool will be closed for cleaning and the coach’s evaluation would have to wait.
I doubt I could explain how I felt tonight to anyone who has never been part of raising a child or watching one grow. I looked down at Erin trying her hardest in a new and challenging situation and felt this wave of admiration and astonishment. I felt a bit like a bird peering at the Mockingbird chick that hatched from the egg in the nest. Could this child who is constantly running, jumping and now hauling herself through the water in all kinds of strokes really be the child of someone who was always picked last for every team? I have only fallen in love with physical activity in the past 5 years. Before that, I always wanted to sit and read, draw or stitch.
I have two daughters that constantly amaze and enchant me. I hope I am always able to give them both roots and wings. I hope I can support them in their wild and crazy dreams, encourage them to at least try a new challenge to see if they like it and comfort them or help pick up the pieces when something truly becomes impossible or unreachable.
I’m still chasing new dreams in this my 40th year...
OK! This is getting too philosophical. Time for this dragon to head to bed!
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
Soggy, Croaky But Satisfied...
It was a wet, cold miserable long weekend here in the Maritimes. We got over 4 inches of rain on Sunday and I kept checking the street to see if any animals were lining up two by two anywhere! Luckily, though we did get quite the pond in the backyard, it didn’t come near the windows to my basement office. We ran the pump for a tiny bit just to get some of the pond water out to the front of the house. I can see a bit more terra-forming in our summer plans!
The girls and I have all been fighting horrid colds and sinus infections, so we’re a coughy, croaky bunch. Maybe it is all the cold and damp that have made this start to 2005 so wicked for germs. We seem to all be on the mend at last, so perhaps it was better to have a quiet weekend indoors after all. Nick couldn’t tackle any of his outdoor projects, but did replace the taps in the kitchen and upstairs bathroom. Our house is now almost 17 years old (we’ve been in it for 14 years now) and so we’re getting into that fix it or move stage. Nick often laughs when I insist on staying partly because of all the early leaflets out there with our street address on it rather than the PO box. I’m also just getting my backyard to where the perennials are nicely balanced and would hate to have to start over with just a square of green grass!
It was very ironic that on the same night as the American Idol finals, I went to speak to Erin’s Girl Guide troop about what it is to be an Artist. One of the Second Year badge components has the girls learning about what an artist’s work/job entails, so I brought along my portfolio and shared some artwork with them. I say ironic, because here were two young people who had spent the past 6 months singing their hearts out in front of the public eye to win a title that would bring them fame, fortune and probably great riches. I actually used them in my talk to the girls to explain that when you really want to do something, even if you have a lot of talent, it still takes work, practice and lots of determination. It doesn’t just come magically. I also pointed out that for every famous person who becomes a “Superstar”, there are lots of other people who make a perfectly good living doing what they love as their job.... singing in a production on Broadway, doing back-up vocals, putting on shows on cruise ships or at theme parks (I can almost hear Simon’s comments now!) The point I was making to the girls is that with any creative job such as acting, singing or art, you have to work at perfecting what it is that you do and sometimes making your OWN way to get noticed rather than waiting for someone to “discover” you. A very big part about making a living from your talent actually has more to do with being able to look after the everyday things like paying bills, collecting on accounts, sourcing new clients or promoting yourself.
It was incredibly satisfying to sit there and share with them that I first decided to “draw pictures for my job” when I was 11 years old.... almost 29 years ago. It hasn’t always been easy or as lucrative as some people imagine, but I have been blessed to do what I love to do for my career. Sometimes I use paint, sometimes I use the computer and sometimes I use thread... but I have created images that have made me smile, touched other people and will last longer than I do.
That is what I always wanted to do as my job!
It was a wet, cold miserable long weekend here in the Maritimes. We got over 4 inches of rain on Sunday and I kept checking the street to see if any animals were lining up two by two anywhere! Luckily, though we did get quite the pond in the backyard, it didn’t come near the windows to my basement office. We ran the pump for a tiny bit just to get some of the pond water out to the front of the house. I can see a bit more terra-forming in our summer plans!
The girls and I have all been fighting horrid colds and sinus infections, so we’re a coughy, croaky bunch. Maybe it is all the cold and damp that have made this start to 2005 so wicked for germs. We seem to all be on the mend at last, so perhaps it was better to have a quiet weekend indoors after all. Nick couldn’t tackle any of his outdoor projects, but did replace the taps in the kitchen and upstairs bathroom. Our house is now almost 17 years old (we’ve been in it for 14 years now) and so we’re getting into that fix it or move stage. Nick often laughs when I insist on staying partly because of all the early leaflets out there with our street address on it rather than the PO box. I’m also just getting my backyard to where the perennials are nicely balanced and would hate to have to start over with just a square of green grass!
It was very ironic that on the same night as the American Idol finals, I went to speak to Erin’s Girl Guide troop about what it is to be an Artist. One of the Second Year badge components has the girls learning about what an artist’s work/job entails, so I brought along my portfolio and shared some artwork with them. I say ironic, because here were two young people who had spent the past 6 months singing their hearts out in front of the public eye to win a title that would bring them fame, fortune and probably great riches. I actually used them in my talk to the girls to explain that when you really want to do something, even if you have a lot of talent, it still takes work, practice and lots of determination. It doesn’t just come magically. I also pointed out that for every famous person who becomes a “Superstar”, there are lots of other people who make a perfectly good living doing what they love as their job.... singing in a production on Broadway, doing back-up vocals, putting on shows on cruise ships or at theme parks (I can almost hear Simon’s comments now!) The point I was making to the girls is that with any creative job such as acting, singing or art, you have to work at perfecting what it is that you do and sometimes making your OWN way to get noticed rather than waiting for someone to “discover” you. A very big part about making a living from your talent actually has more to do with being able to look after the everyday things like paying bills, collecting on accounts, sourcing new clients or promoting yourself.
It was incredibly satisfying to sit there and share with them that I first decided to “draw pictures for my job” when I was 11 years old.... almost 29 years ago. It hasn’t always been easy or as lucrative as some people imagine, but I have been blessed to do what I love to do for my career. Sometimes I use paint, sometimes I use the computer and sometimes I use thread... but I have created images that have made me smile, touched other people and will last longer than I do.
That is what I always wanted to do as my job!
Monday, May 16, 2005
Wounded Dragonlets...
I’ve just about had enough of the Canadian Health Care System in the past week. The fact that so many cuts have absolutely cannibalized what used to be the pride of our country while millions of our tax dollars were spent funding bogus Sponsorship events in Quebec or lining the pockets of politicians and ad executives is enough to make me SCREAM!
Thursday night, Erin had her first mountain bike accident and we spend over 4.5 hours in the Emergency Department of the hospital, 4 of which was just waiting for a chance to get down to X-ray! She was scrapped up and shaken, but the right hand pinkie finger that she landed on with most of her weight was just badly sprained rather than broken. She has it “dummy splinted” to her ring finger and we’re waiting to see if the swelling will go down. Nick felt horrible because he was the one who took her out to the trails so that they could both try out their mountain bikes and apparently Erin’s front tire caught his back one as they came down a slight hill a bit too close together. Considering the fact that there were people in the Emergency department who’d been there for over 7 hours, we got off lightly, but it has left a very sour taste in my mouth to see the Prime Minister who campaigned on fixing health care beg for more time in office until the full extent of the Sponsorship Scandal is known.
Friday night was family activity night at St. Pat’s right after Nick and I finished our deep water running class, so we dried off and met the girls in the gym for some summer fun of badminton, beach balls and frisbees. Unfortunately as Nick tried to show Bethany the neat trick of “skipping” the frisbee off the floor first, she rushed forward to try to catch what she thought was a low throw and the frisbee bounced right up into her bottom lip, curling it over the bottom teeth so that they went right into her lip and started the blood flowing everywhere. Bethany is like her father and goes absolutely WHITE at the sight of blood. I don’t think I realized how many freckles she had until they all stood out against her pale face! We got some ice and managed to staunch the flow of blood, but her lip puffed up like crazy which scared her further. “Can lips break forever, Mommy?” she kept asking. I explained how fast mouths heal and sure enough by this morning at the bus stop, there was hardly enough to show off to her friends except on the inside of the lips where the scraped area is trying to make new skin. Poor Nick felt horrid and hardly even cracked a smile when other people started teasing me that I would be next! Had she needed stitches, it would have been HIS turn to go sit for hours at the hospital... if I’d been able to pry my little Bethany possum from my body.
Now the house is quiet on a grey, rainy, cold May morning. It looks and feels more like November outside unless I take in a deep lung full of air. Then I can smell the wet growing things making the most of this moisture. I have paperwork to sort through and a missing receipt to find in the chaos of my office. We received a damaged pile of patterns on Friday from the US Post Office that looks like HALF of my last Hoffman shipment in pieces, so I am hinting for the insurance receipt that seems not to be in the postage file. Sigh! I think if I wrap my claws around something warm and put on some good tunes, I can pretend that I am actually looking for treasure in the piles instead!
I’ve just about had enough of the Canadian Health Care System in the past week. The fact that so many cuts have absolutely cannibalized what used to be the pride of our country while millions of our tax dollars were spent funding bogus Sponsorship events in Quebec or lining the pockets of politicians and ad executives is enough to make me SCREAM!
Thursday night, Erin had her first mountain bike accident and we spend over 4.5 hours in the Emergency Department of the hospital, 4 of which was just waiting for a chance to get down to X-ray! She was scrapped up and shaken, but the right hand pinkie finger that she landed on with most of her weight was just badly sprained rather than broken. She has it “dummy splinted” to her ring finger and we’re waiting to see if the swelling will go down. Nick felt horrible because he was the one who took her out to the trails so that they could both try out their mountain bikes and apparently Erin’s front tire caught his back one as they came down a slight hill a bit too close together. Considering the fact that there were people in the Emergency department who’d been there for over 7 hours, we got off lightly, but it has left a very sour taste in my mouth to see the Prime Minister who campaigned on fixing health care beg for more time in office until the full extent of the Sponsorship Scandal is known.
Friday night was family activity night at St. Pat’s right after Nick and I finished our deep water running class, so we dried off and met the girls in the gym for some summer fun of badminton, beach balls and frisbees. Unfortunately as Nick tried to show Bethany the neat trick of “skipping” the frisbee off the floor first, she rushed forward to try to catch what she thought was a low throw and the frisbee bounced right up into her bottom lip, curling it over the bottom teeth so that they went right into her lip and started the blood flowing everywhere. Bethany is like her father and goes absolutely WHITE at the sight of blood. I don’t think I realized how many freckles she had until they all stood out against her pale face! We got some ice and managed to staunch the flow of blood, but her lip puffed up like crazy which scared her further. “Can lips break forever, Mommy?” she kept asking. I explained how fast mouths heal and sure enough by this morning at the bus stop, there was hardly enough to show off to her friends except on the inside of the lips where the scraped area is trying to make new skin. Poor Nick felt horrid and hardly even cracked a smile when other people started teasing me that I would be next! Had she needed stitches, it would have been HIS turn to go sit for hours at the hospital... if I’d been able to pry my little Bethany possum from my body.
Now the house is quiet on a grey, rainy, cold May morning. It looks and feels more like November outside unless I take in a deep lung full of air. Then I can smell the wet growing things making the most of this moisture. I have paperwork to sort through and a missing receipt to find in the chaos of my office. We received a damaged pile of patterns on Friday from the US Post Office that looks like HALF of my last Hoffman shipment in pieces, so I am hinting for the insurance receipt that seems not to be in the postage file. Sigh! I think if I wrap my claws around something warm and put on some good tunes, I can pretend that I am actually looking for treasure in the piles instead!
Sunday, May 08, 2005
The Mothers In My Life...
It was, despite the pounding 40 mm ( almost 2 inches) of rain and high winds, quite a wonderful Mother’s Day! I woke up early in the morning to the sound of the rain and wind lashing against our bedroom window. The sound of running water always produces a rather predictable result with me... and I needed to leave the warm coziness of our bed for the bathroom. Peering out into the back yard, I could see that a rather large pond was forming at the end of the deck and so raced downstairs to be sure that nothing was coming in the basement windows again. The sound of Mommy thumping down the stairs in her bunny slippers woke the girls, who were then in a panic about getting my Mother’s Day gifts to the table before I got there. They decided instead to pounce on me the moment I returned upstairs and present me with presents in bed! They were quite keen to serve me breakfast in bed as well, but the thought of bits of Shredded Wheat finding its way into my bed sheets or frozen blueberries hitting the duvet cover were enough to have me begging for breakfast at the dining room table “fancy restaurant style”. I was ordered to remain in bed until they were ready. When Nick and I were called down (after much cupboard slamming and thumping sounds), we found the table set up for a romantic candlelight breakfast with the frozen blueberries and milk in their own special containers and water in fancy glasses near our lovingly pulverized Shredded Wheat biscuits. Erin explained that the candles were left alone because “they weren’t allowed to touch the matches yet!”
Erin and Bethany both sing in the Sunbeam Choir at church. They repeated their new song from last Sunday night’s concert where many of them got stage fright in front of such a huge audience. Bethany had missed her closing solo entirely and had to repeat it under prompting from the director, so this morning she was in an absolute panic that she would “mess everything up and ruin it again!” I explained that making a JOYFUL noise did not mean making a PERFECT noise... but when one of the boys doing a solo right before her failed to get out of the way to let her to the mike, she missed her cue during the first practice and promptly burst into tears. She and I spent minutes cuddling while the senior choir practiced their number. One of the older girls in the Sunbeam Choir who is also quite shy, like Bethany< came over to tell her that she got scared too having to start off the whole song. With encouragement from everyone and some clever blocking by the Choir director to get one boy away from the mike as soon as his turn was done to make room for Bethany, things went much better during the second rehearsal. When it came time for the performance during the service, everything went beautifully. Erin’s confident solo carried all the way to the back of the church and she anchored most of the piece without overpowering everyone else. Then, as the end drew near, Bethany approached the mike, took a deep breath and out came this lovely sweet voice to close off the piece with her solo. As soon as she was done, her face split into this radiant grin that I could just make out through the tears of pride and joy streaming down my face.
After church we raced home to check on the backyard, run the pump for a bit and then grabbed the lobster out of the fridge to head down to spend the afternoon with Nick’s Mum and Jerome. We had a wonderful feast with homemade rolls, light salads, lobster and a lovely low-calorie dessert she’d created. They’ve been losing weight steadily since Jerome’s heart problems at the beginning of the year, so it was nice to have a meal that satisfied taste buds without making us feel stuffed. We curled up in the living room and Mum (I stopped calling her by her first name recently because she really is my “other mother”) showed me how to turn my 10 skeins of wool into balls. I’d spent almost 2 hours grumbling and untangling one skein the night before to wind it into a single ball. As I held the wool skein on my hand, she showed me how to create a ball of yarn that I’d be able to draw the wool from the center instead of the outside. It does cut down on the amount of escaping and rolling your ball of wool does as you knit!!
We drove home before dark past swollen rivers and almost flooded roadways to call my own Mom and wish her a Happy Mother’s Day. I then tucked Bethany into bed, got Erin set up for her 20 minutes of French reading and disappeared down here to reflect on Motherhood and the women who have mothered to me in my life.
I have been blessed to have a Mother who took the time to make things with us, left little notes, inspired us to find our wings even as she longed to keep us close to home, showed us that it was never too late in life to try new things and always made us feel loved, even when we fought with her. Her example gave me so much to draw from as I became a Mother myself. She still chuckles sometimes when I call to say “SORRY!!” for stuff that I did as a child now that I can see it from the parent’s perspective!! While she told me many times when I was young that I would understand better when I became a Mother, she has never said “I told you so!” in all the years that have proved her right!
Instead of a “Monster-In-Law” that some describe, I found in my husband’s mother a wonderful lady whose creativity and pursuit of excellence I can very much understand, whose compassion and determination I try to emulate and whose objective tenderness I have come to appreciate and treasure since it comes without the parent/child ties that sometimes get so tangled. Between Mum and Mom, I have great women to keep my own journey through Motherhood a bit saner.
There have also been other strong women who have “mothered” to me at various times in my life whom I also think of on this special day. Mothering does not necessarily have to involve the act of giving birth to forge those ties of heart or spirit between lives. The physical act of bringing a new life into this world does not create a Mother in the truest sense of the word... I doubt that I could ever put it into words that would do justice to the power, the empathy, the compassion, the vulnerability, the sacrifice, the separation, the terror, the pride, the fears, the joys, the dreams and the depth that true motherhood calls forth from a person who “mothers” to another. Those gifts and memories, those deeds and bits of wisdom become a part of my own Motherhood tapestry that will someday weave on without me as the thread is picked up and continued on.
It was, despite the pounding 40 mm ( almost 2 inches) of rain and high winds, quite a wonderful Mother’s Day! I woke up early in the morning to the sound of the rain and wind lashing against our bedroom window. The sound of running water always produces a rather predictable result with me... and I needed to leave the warm coziness of our bed for the bathroom. Peering out into the back yard, I could see that a rather large pond was forming at the end of the deck and so raced downstairs to be sure that nothing was coming in the basement windows again. The sound of Mommy thumping down the stairs in her bunny slippers woke the girls, who were then in a panic about getting my Mother’s Day gifts to the table before I got there. They decided instead to pounce on me the moment I returned upstairs and present me with presents in bed! They were quite keen to serve me breakfast in bed as well, but the thought of bits of Shredded Wheat finding its way into my bed sheets or frozen blueberries hitting the duvet cover were enough to have me begging for breakfast at the dining room table “fancy restaurant style”. I was ordered to remain in bed until they were ready. When Nick and I were called down (after much cupboard slamming and thumping sounds), we found the table set up for a romantic candlelight breakfast with the frozen blueberries and milk in their own special containers and water in fancy glasses near our lovingly pulverized Shredded Wheat biscuits. Erin explained that the candles were left alone because “they weren’t allowed to touch the matches yet!”
Erin and Bethany both sing in the Sunbeam Choir at church. They repeated their new song from last Sunday night’s concert where many of them got stage fright in front of such a huge audience. Bethany had missed her closing solo entirely and had to repeat it under prompting from the director, so this morning she was in an absolute panic that she would “mess everything up and ruin it again!” I explained that making a JOYFUL noise did not mean making a PERFECT noise... but when one of the boys doing a solo right before her failed to get out of the way to let her to the mike, she missed her cue during the first practice and promptly burst into tears. She and I spent minutes cuddling while the senior choir practiced their number. One of the older girls in the Sunbeam Choir who is also quite shy, like Bethany< came over to tell her that she got scared too having to start off the whole song. With encouragement from everyone and some clever blocking by the Choir director to get one boy away from the mike as soon as his turn was done to make room for Bethany, things went much better during the second rehearsal. When it came time for the performance during the service, everything went beautifully. Erin’s confident solo carried all the way to the back of the church and she anchored most of the piece without overpowering everyone else. Then, as the end drew near, Bethany approached the mike, took a deep breath and out came this lovely sweet voice to close off the piece with her solo. As soon as she was done, her face split into this radiant grin that I could just make out through the tears of pride and joy streaming down my face.
After church we raced home to check on the backyard, run the pump for a bit and then grabbed the lobster out of the fridge to head down to spend the afternoon with Nick’s Mum and Jerome. We had a wonderful feast with homemade rolls, light salads, lobster and a lovely low-calorie dessert she’d created. They’ve been losing weight steadily since Jerome’s heart problems at the beginning of the year, so it was nice to have a meal that satisfied taste buds without making us feel stuffed. We curled up in the living room and Mum (I stopped calling her by her first name recently because she really is my “other mother”) showed me how to turn my 10 skeins of wool into balls. I’d spent almost 2 hours grumbling and untangling one skein the night before to wind it into a single ball. As I held the wool skein on my hand, she showed me how to create a ball of yarn that I’d be able to draw the wool from the center instead of the outside. It does cut down on the amount of escaping and rolling your ball of wool does as you knit!!
We drove home before dark past swollen rivers and almost flooded roadways to call my own Mom and wish her a Happy Mother’s Day. I then tucked Bethany into bed, got Erin set up for her 20 minutes of French reading and disappeared down here to reflect on Motherhood and the women who have mothered to me in my life.
I have been blessed to have a Mother who took the time to make things with us, left little notes, inspired us to find our wings even as she longed to keep us close to home, showed us that it was never too late in life to try new things and always made us feel loved, even when we fought with her. Her example gave me so much to draw from as I became a Mother myself. She still chuckles sometimes when I call to say “SORRY!!” for stuff that I did as a child now that I can see it from the parent’s perspective!! While she told me many times when I was young that I would understand better when I became a Mother, she has never said “I told you so!” in all the years that have proved her right!
Instead of a “Monster-In-Law” that some describe, I found in my husband’s mother a wonderful lady whose creativity and pursuit of excellence I can very much understand, whose compassion and determination I try to emulate and whose objective tenderness I have come to appreciate and treasure since it comes without the parent/child ties that sometimes get so tangled. Between Mum and Mom, I have great women to keep my own journey through Motherhood a bit saner.
There have also been other strong women who have “mothered” to me at various times in my life whom I also think of on this special day. Mothering does not necessarily have to involve the act of giving birth to forge those ties of heart or spirit between lives. The physical act of bringing a new life into this world does not create a Mother in the truest sense of the word... I doubt that I could ever put it into words that would do justice to the power, the empathy, the compassion, the vulnerability, the sacrifice, the separation, the terror, the pride, the fears, the joys, the dreams and the depth that true motherhood calls forth from a person who “mothers” to another. Those gifts and memories, those deeds and bits of wisdom become a part of my own Motherhood tapestry that will someday weave on without me as the thread is picked up and continued on.
Wednesday, April 27, 2005
Home Sweet Home...
I finally arrived home late Monday afternoon.. almost 20 hours later than I was supposed to thanks to Canjet’s lack of planes and communication. While I was thankful for the hotel room Sunday night and the token meal vouchers, I wish that they’d been more up front with all of us on the two flights that ended up being canceled. It wasn’t until we all gathered at the airport lounge the next day that we began to piece together what we think must have happened.
When the first plane was affected, they looked at which flight had the least amount of people booked on it (the Moncton flight) and delayed then canceled that one. When the plane arrived late from New York for the flight that needed to go to Halifax... it was mysteriously canceled after the waiting flight crew was sent off somewhere. Many of the people on that aborted Halifax flight believe that their plane was instead commandeered to head down to Florida and rescue the stranded passengers there to bring them to Toronto. A few of them ended up on our newly created Monday 12:35 pm flight. At least.... it should have been 12:35.
Most of us got to the airport in plenty of time. I even managed to find some “Make it up to the Kids” goodies while waiting. I also did a cartoon sketch of a dragon stranded in a waiting lounge with other passengers as the rain pours down outside with a caption that reads “Really? My flight was grounded due to bad weather too!” As the time to board the plane grew closer, the girl at the check in counter came on the intercom to explain that although the plane was ready to go, they were still waiting for the crew that was being bussed in from Hamilton!!! You should have heard the groans, screams and general cries of outrage when that announcement was made. They did give the crew a standing ovation and round of cheers when they did arrive, and we all clapped ourselves silly when the plane finally took off. I didn’t kiss the ground when I arrived safely in Moncton, but the thought did cross my mind. Instead, I headed home to hug my family!!
Now, I am tackling my last two big deadlines for May 1st... then I can’t wait for life to switch to a calmer pace... I have a dragon to finish stitching!
I finally arrived home late Monday afternoon.. almost 20 hours later than I was supposed to thanks to Canjet’s lack of planes and communication. While I was thankful for the hotel room Sunday night and the token meal vouchers, I wish that they’d been more up front with all of us on the two flights that ended up being canceled. It wasn’t until we all gathered at the airport lounge the next day that we began to piece together what we think must have happened.
When the first plane was affected, they looked at which flight had the least amount of people booked on it (the Moncton flight) and delayed then canceled that one. When the plane arrived late from New York for the flight that needed to go to Halifax... it was mysteriously canceled after the waiting flight crew was sent off somewhere. Many of the people on that aborted Halifax flight believe that their plane was instead commandeered to head down to Florida and rescue the stranded passengers there to bring them to Toronto. A few of them ended up on our newly created Monday 12:35 pm flight. At least.... it should have been 12:35.
Most of us got to the airport in plenty of time. I even managed to find some “Make it up to the Kids” goodies while waiting. I also did a cartoon sketch of a dragon stranded in a waiting lounge with other passengers as the rain pours down outside with a caption that reads “Really? My flight was grounded due to bad weather too!” As the time to board the plane grew closer, the girl at the check in counter came on the intercom to explain that although the plane was ready to go, they were still waiting for the crew that was being bussed in from Hamilton!!! You should have heard the groans, screams and general cries of outrage when that announcement was made. They did give the crew a standing ovation and round of cheers when they did arrive, and we all clapped ourselves silly when the plane finally took off. I didn’t kiss the ground when I arrived safely in Moncton, but the thought did cross my mind. Instead, I headed home to hug my family!!
Now, I am tackling my last two big deadlines for May 1st... then I can’t wait for life to switch to a calmer pace... I have a dragon to finish stitching!
Monday, April 25, 2005
Grounded Dragon Stuck In Toronto
Well.... I never made it home last night to the utter dismay of my girls. The flight to Moncton was cancelled entirely. In an Amazing Race moment, four of us tried to jump on a flight to Halifax and then rent a car to drive to Moncton... but just as we got our luggage back, raced up escalators and went to the head of the Check-in line, they cancelled that flight as well!So I got on a hotel shuttle and spent another night in a Toronto hotel room. At least I got some stitching done! I just can't wait to hug my family!!!! By 4:00 pm today I should be there.. they created a new flight just for all us strays. I certainly wish this dragon had wings of her own!!
Well.... I never made it home last night to the utter dismay of my girls. The flight to Moncton was cancelled entirely. In an Amazing Race moment, four of us tried to jump on a flight to Halifax and then rent a car to drive to Moncton... but just as we got our luggage back, raced up escalators and went to the head of the Check-in line, they cancelled that flight as well!So I got on a hotel shuttle and spent another night in a Toronto hotel room. At least I got some stitching done! I just can't wait to hug my family!!!! By 4:00 pm today I should be there.. they created a new flight just for all us strays. I certainly wish this dragon had wings of her own!!
Sunday, April 24, 2005
Stuck When I Want To Be Home!
I finished teaching my classes at the CSNF in Toronto this afternoon at 4:20 and raced right to the airport to check in for my 6:30 flight home. I was so excited to get a connection that would have me on the ground by 9:30, which meant that Nick could meet me at the airport!
When I arrived here, I discovered that Canjet was flying one plane short... so my flight had been rescheduled to leave here at MIDNIGHT! Wannnnnhhhhh! I can feel for all the scrambling they've had to do, but compared to our experiences in the US this past March Break, flying on Canadian airlines leaves a LOT to be desired... no meal voucher, nada.
Now I'm going to be flying home through icky weather, heavy rain and only getting home sometime after 2:30 pm. There's only one thing to do... go find a comfy seat and stitch!
I can't wait to hug and hold my family once I make it home!!
I finished teaching my classes at the CSNF in Toronto this afternoon at 4:20 and raced right to the airport to check in for my 6:30 flight home. I was so excited to get a connection that would have me on the ground by 9:30, which meant that Nick could meet me at the airport!
When I arrived here, I discovered that Canjet was flying one plane short... so my flight had been rescheduled to leave here at MIDNIGHT! Wannnnnhhhhh! I can feel for all the scrambling they've had to do, but compared to our experiences in the US this past March Break, flying on Canadian airlines leaves a LOT to be desired... no meal voucher, nada.
Now I'm going to be flying home through icky weather, heavy rain and only getting home sometime after 2:30 pm. There's only one thing to do... go find a comfy seat and stitch!
I can't wait to hug and hold my family once I make it home!!
Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Toronto Bound...
I get on the plane tomorrow morning at 6 am to fly up to Toronto for the Spring Creative Sewing and Needlework Festival. I’ve survived the barfies and 2 week queasies that came with that rotten flu, celebrated both my girls’ birthdays, finished another major graphics assignment, nursed everyone else in the family through another round of head colds and tried to keep on top of things with what still feels like only half of my regular energy.
I had to admit to myself after the flu that “Dragon of the Deeps” was NOT going to be ready for Toronto. It was so hard to feel like I had “failed” a deadline of my own making... but the design is turning out so much better than I expected that I refuse to cut corners and rush it. The border just “sings” and I think I might even like it better than the one in Moonlight Guardian! I know that I can release it through Hoffman for the June show in Columbus.... but it still feels strange. A decade ago, I would have gone the week or two on 3 hours sleep a night to get it done. Does that make me wiser now or less single-minded?
Mum and John are here to help with the girls while I am away, especially important since the teachers are on Work To Rule and the daily schedules are all wonky. Bethany isn’t quite as sad... or wasn’t until I tucked her into bed tonight. How do I explain to her that as much as I love her, I also really enjoy the time being away and “ON” like I get to be at these shows. Meeting stitchers and spending time amid so many different crafts is one of the most wonderful things about the Creative Sewing and Needlework Festival. It is unlike any show I have ever attended. I get SO inspired to try crafts of all kinds... that I hope my inner batteries get a real boost.
Once I get through May 1st, I hope life will return to a more reasonable pace and I can catch up on all my e-mail. I guess the April Fool’s joke is that my website got stuck in a time warp of that weekend for the whole month!
I get on the plane tomorrow morning at 6 am to fly up to Toronto for the Spring Creative Sewing and Needlework Festival. I’ve survived the barfies and 2 week queasies that came with that rotten flu, celebrated both my girls’ birthdays, finished another major graphics assignment, nursed everyone else in the family through another round of head colds and tried to keep on top of things with what still feels like only half of my regular energy.
I had to admit to myself after the flu that “Dragon of the Deeps” was NOT going to be ready for Toronto. It was so hard to feel like I had “failed” a deadline of my own making... but the design is turning out so much better than I expected that I refuse to cut corners and rush it. The border just “sings” and I think I might even like it better than the one in Moonlight Guardian! I know that I can release it through Hoffman for the June show in Columbus.... but it still feels strange. A decade ago, I would have gone the week or two on 3 hours sleep a night to get it done. Does that make me wiser now or less single-minded?
Mum and John are here to help with the girls while I am away, especially important since the teachers are on Work To Rule and the daily schedules are all wonky. Bethany isn’t quite as sad... or wasn’t until I tucked her into bed tonight. How do I explain to her that as much as I love her, I also really enjoy the time being away and “ON” like I get to be at these shows. Meeting stitchers and spending time amid so many different crafts is one of the most wonderful things about the Creative Sewing and Needlework Festival. It is unlike any show I have ever attended. I get SO inspired to try crafts of all kinds... that I hope my inner batteries get a real boost.
Once I get through May 1st, I hope life will return to a more reasonable pace and I can catch up on all my e-mail. I guess the April Fool’s joke is that my website got stuck in a time warp of that weekend for the whole month!
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
I HATE Being A Barfy Dragon!
Yesterday was horrid. The one thing I hate most in the world is being sick to my stomach. For some reason, when I had all the morning sickness while carrying Bethany inside me and gallbladder attacks during my pregnancy with Erin, the nerve that triggers the gag reflex got out of whack. If I am sick to my stomach at all, it just keeps going and going and going.
I know to get myself right to the hospital, so once we got our girls to the neighbours for breakfast and off to school, Nick drove me right to Emergency before heading off to work. I will say this for our medical system - if you are being violently ill to your stomach, they get you off into a room rather quickly!
Since it has been over a year since my last “barfy adventure”, the standing order for Maxoran was no longer on file. It actually took two separate drugs in two sequential IVs to shut everything down and made for a very long morning in a short hospital bed.
Once I was released, I crawled into bed and pretty much stayed there until this afternoon. I stirred my own bubbles out of the glass of ginger ale... but it’s not quite the same as having your mom do it. Funny how easy it is to feel like a little kid when you are sick. The girls were actually a big help because they knew I just wasn’t up to much.
I hope I can curl up on the couch and stitch a bit tonight.
Yesterday was horrid. The one thing I hate most in the world is being sick to my stomach. For some reason, when I had all the morning sickness while carrying Bethany inside me and gallbladder attacks during my pregnancy with Erin, the nerve that triggers the gag reflex got out of whack. If I am sick to my stomach at all, it just keeps going and going and going.
I know to get myself right to the hospital, so once we got our girls to the neighbours for breakfast and off to school, Nick drove me right to Emergency before heading off to work. I will say this for our medical system - if you are being violently ill to your stomach, they get you off into a room rather quickly!
Since it has been over a year since my last “barfy adventure”, the standing order for Maxoran was no longer on file. It actually took two separate drugs in two sequential IVs to shut everything down and made for a very long morning in a short hospital bed.
Once I was released, I crawled into bed and pretty much stayed there until this afternoon. I stirred my own bubbles out of the glass of ginger ale... but it’s not quite the same as having your mom do it. Funny how easy it is to feel like a little kid when you are sick. The girls were actually a big help because they knew I just wasn’t up to much.
I hope I can curl up on the couch and stitch a bit tonight.
Monday, March 21, 2005
Of Floods and Stresses, Swim Badges, Pant Hems and Hamsters!
What an odd mix in the title .... I know. Coming back from vacation is always a bit stressful as you have to leave behind the carefree days of very little schedules and structure to jump back full tilt into activities, responsibilities and MOUNTAINS of laundry, but last week was so wild that I didn’t even have my computer on for 48 hours!!
We arrived home half a day later than expected, having volunteered to be bumped on an overbooked flight from Detroit to Bangor, Maine, thus earning our tickets for next year’s Spring Break, only to find a note from our cleaning ladies telling us that our basement had flooded! There had been a rain storm with high winds on ground that was still very frozen, so much of the water around the city had almost nowhere to go. They’d managed to catch the worst of it in my office and the family room with the wet/dry vacuum and set the dehumidifier running, but I still lost a few boxes of product to some water damage for stuff that had been down on the floor. I also wanted to be sure that everything was nice and dry before powering up either computer! I guess we were lucky compared to some of the people in town who actually had INCHES of water in the basement instead of just puddles, but it made coming home to reality a bit more abrupt than we wanted.
As soon as the computers were back on, I jumped right back into a huge assignment for one client with two complex layouts and way too much information to fit in them. Nick also had a week at school with the principal out on preretirement leave, but neither of the 3 Vice-Principals really in charge of more than their own section. Murphy’s Law demands that that’s when everything will go “snakey-bananas” right?? Right!
By Friday, we were all feeling tired from a week back, so we had a fun family evening to relax. Saturday morning, both girls were tested during their last swim lesson of this session and passed their levels with flying colours. Bethany completed Level 3 in the red cross series while Erin passed Level 9!
After lunch on Saturday, we took Nick off for some much needed wardrobe upgrading and found a wonderful outfit for his job interview today. He is applying for a Principalship of an elementary school here in town for next year and is both thrilled and nervous to have the interview fall on this, his birthday. The pants of the outfit needed to be hemmed right away, so we took a walk to the pet store in the same complex to see what they had.
I’ve been missing Nipper incredibly since her passing after Christmas, but we wanted to get through March Break before adding a new hamster to the household. The shop where we’d purchased Nipper had a litter of babies that were almost ready for sale, but they would be one step even more inbred than Nipper since it was two of her siblings that mated. Diabetes being so hereditary in Dwarf Hamsters, I just wasn’t willing to take that chance again. It hurts too much to say goodbye to them when they die so quickly!
We saw one little dwarf hamster in a cage all by itself (or so we thought) and asked the clerk if we could see it up close. She smiled and told us that this new batch had just arrived from the breeder and were VERY friendly! She poked the bedding and revealed a few more fast asleep, but the little one we’d been watching walked right over to her and climbed into her hand! She handed him to me and he promptly tried to climb right up my coat sleeve with nary a nip or nibble!! What a change from Nipper who certainly lived up to her name and only achieved marginal tameness at best. He clambered out of my hand to Erin’s and then back into mine, sniffing everything in sight, and we just beamed at the store clerk and yelled “SOLD!” All the way home, he kept sticking the tip of his nose out of the holes in the box to sniff the air and “wuffle” his nose about, so Wuffles he became. He is the friendliest little fur ball I have ever seen and even Nick has held him!
Welcome to our home, Wuffles!!!
What an odd mix in the title .... I know. Coming back from vacation is always a bit stressful as you have to leave behind the carefree days of very little schedules and structure to jump back full tilt into activities, responsibilities and MOUNTAINS of laundry, but last week was so wild that I didn’t even have my computer on for 48 hours!!
We arrived home half a day later than expected, having volunteered to be bumped on an overbooked flight from Detroit to Bangor, Maine, thus earning our tickets for next year’s Spring Break, only to find a note from our cleaning ladies telling us that our basement had flooded! There had been a rain storm with high winds on ground that was still very frozen, so much of the water around the city had almost nowhere to go. They’d managed to catch the worst of it in my office and the family room with the wet/dry vacuum and set the dehumidifier running, but I still lost a few boxes of product to some water damage for stuff that had been down on the floor. I also wanted to be sure that everything was nice and dry before powering up either computer! I guess we were lucky compared to some of the people in town who actually had INCHES of water in the basement instead of just puddles, but it made coming home to reality a bit more abrupt than we wanted.
As soon as the computers were back on, I jumped right back into a huge assignment for one client with two complex layouts and way too much information to fit in them. Nick also had a week at school with the principal out on preretirement leave, but neither of the 3 Vice-Principals really in charge of more than their own section. Murphy’s Law demands that that’s when everything will go “snakey-bananas” right?? Right!
By Friday, we were all feeling tired from a week back, so we had a fun family evening to relax. Saturday morning, both girls were tested during their last swim lesson of this session and passed their levels with flying colours. Bethany completed Level 3 in the red cross series while Erin passed Level 9!
After lunch on Saturday, we took Nick off for some much needed wardrobe upgrading and found a wonderful outfit for his job interview today. He is applying for a Principalship of an elementary school here in town for next year and is both thrilled and nervous to have the interview fall on this, his birthday. The pants of the outfit needed to be hemmed right away, so we took a walk to the pet store in the same complex to see what they had.
I’ve been missing Nipper incredibly since her passing after Christmas, but we wanted to get through March Break before adding a new hamster to the household. The shop where we’d purchased Nipper had a litter of babies that were almost ready for sale, but they would be one step even more inbred than Nipper since it was two of her siblings that mated. Diabetes being so hereditary in Dwarf Hamsters, I just wasn’t willing to take that chance again. It hurts too much to say goodbye to them when they die so quickly!
We saw one little dwarf hamster in a cage all by itself (or so we thought) and asked the clerk if we could see it up close. She smiled and told us that this new batch had just arrived from the breeder and were VERY friendly! She poked the bedding and revealed a few more fast asleep, but the little one we’d been watching walked right over to her and climbed into her hand! She handed him to me and he promptly tried to climb right up my coat sleeve with nary a nip or nibble!! What a change from Nipper who certainly lived up to her name and only achieved marginal tameness at best. He clambered out of my hand to Erin’s and then back into mine, sniffing everything in sight, and we just beamed at the store clerk and yelled “SOLD!” All the way home, he kept sticking the tip of his nose out of the holes in the box to sniff the air and “wuffle” his nose about, so Wuffles he became. He is the friendliest little fur ball I have ever seen and even Nick has held him!
Welcome to our home, Wuffles!!!
Friday, March 04, 2005
Taking Time To Be...
The chaos of post Nashville has finally calmed down just a bit and everyone is on the mend from the colds, asthma attacks and general mayhem. I’ve managed to nurse everyone back to health without getting more than the sniffles.
Now, as everyone else in my family will be enjoying March Break, it is time for me to unplug from the world a bit and just take the time to be...
...time to be with my family and remember that they come first.
...time to just lose myself in the pleasure of trying out a box of new crayons in a colouring book or just drawing in my sketchbook for the sheer pleasure of it instead of to come up with ideas.
...time to catch up on sleep.
...time to laugh more with my kids.
...time to spend evenings with my husband where neither of us are batching leaflets as we chat.
...time to go out to a movie or dinner or maybe both!
...time to recharge my hug batteries.
...time to just watch the world around me go by and not fill every moment with things to do or deadlines to meet.
I think I am going to enjoy this!
The chaos of post Nashville has finally calmed down just a bit and everyone is on the mend from the colds, asthma attacks and general mayhem. I’ve managed to nurse everyone back to health without getting more than the sniffles.
Now, as everyone else in my family will be enjoying March Break, it is time for me to unplug from the world a bit and just take the time to be...
...time to be with my family and remember that they come first.
...time to just lose myself in the pleasure of trying out a box of new crayons in a colouring book or just drawing in my sketchbook for the sheer pleasure of it instead of to come up with ideas.
...time to catch up on sleep.
...time to laugh more with my kids.
...time to spend evenings with my husband where neither of us are batching leaflets as we chat.
...time to go out to a movie or dinner or maybe both!
...time to recharge my hug batteries.
...time to just watch the world around me go by and not fill every moment with things to do or deadlines to meet.
I think I am going to enjoy this!
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